whenever i walk or run up flights of stairs?


Question:
i break wind very loudly with every step i take if im late for a appointment and run the stairs i almost sound like a human machine gun is there a plug or bung available on the market for this embarrasing condition its affecting my social life i get strange looks because stairs of a big height have to be taken on my hands and knees one at a time i would go to see my doctor but hes practice is on the 28th floor and the lift/elevator is not a option because of my claustrophobia condition

Answers:
Carry a beat box with you for when you have to tackle stairs! Play it really loud so no one will notice your so called human machine gun you have for an ****!
calm down on the cabbage and beans


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