How do I pick myself back up - self harm?
Question:
Now I just feel really discouraged and down about it. I feel like I've failed myself. But because I've already failed, it starts me thinking "well I've ruined it all now anyway, what difference does it make if I cut some more?"
How can I pick myself back up again and get past this? Because right now I don't really see any reason NOT to self harm.sorry.
Answers:
Hello again, You are Not Allowed to kick yourself like this! And you do not owe us an apology, so you don't have to say sorry, its really not necessary.
The original reason for you to self harm cannot possibly have disappeared in only 6 weeks. You are dealing with it, but it takes time, it takes longer than 6 weeks.
Somehow you got knocked off track. You've forgotten that you are obliged to celebrate 6 weeks of harm free living.
If you had a friend who was so overweight it was time to diet, and she dieted for 6 weeks, then cracked and had a jam doughnut; would you say to her Yeah! Eat All the donuts!
NO! Of course wou wouldn't. You'd say One Donut is Not the end of the process of dieting.
I'm sorry to hear you've hit a rough patch. When we're doing well we forget how down down is. We also forget that its unrealistic to be up all the time, or always able to cope or be superhuman or whatever.
So no, you are not allowed to quit, you have a responsibility to get yourself through the next few days until things start to pick up. You've done it before so you've had some practice.
Put the sharp things out of your way and get yourself some ice cubes, thats an order!
Then treat yourself to something nice, I insist; some hot chocolate and marshmallows or something. I don't want to hear any excuses, just do something comforting for yourself and learn to take it. If you can't take comfort from yourself you can't take it from others either.
Hang on in there.
Get The Samaritans phone number, do it right now, and PHONE them, don't make any excuses. Just do it. If you feel like you're cut off from your support look elsewhere for support.
Other Answers:
NEVER GIVE UP!
Everyone is screwed up in some way. Booze, Drugs, Porn, Violence, Lying, Stealing, Emotional Abuse, False Beliefs, Gluttony etc.
You chose a more apparent form of self-harm. This is a set back - not a dive off a cliff.
What tools did you use to so well for the past 6 weeks?
Smile someone loves you. God does too.
Every time you think about cutting yourself, realize that masturbating would be ten times better, and do that instead. It's a lot healthier for you, honestly. you can't never give up. God is whit you, He will never give up on you.
Therapy and skills training can be very useful for those who self-harm. The therapy module used will vary depending on the person's diagnosis and their individual needs. DBT, or Dialectical behavioral therapy can be very successful for those with a personality disorder, and could potentially be used for those with other mental illnesses who exhibit self-harm behavior. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is generally used to assist those with axis 1 diagnoses, such as depression, schizophrenia, and bipolar disorder. Diagnosis and treatment of the causes is thought by many to be the best approach to self-harm; but in some cases, particularly in clients with a personality disorder, this is not very effective, which is why more clinicians are starting to take a DBT approach in order to reduce the behavior itself. A person who is injuring themselves may be advised to use coping skills, such as journaling or taking a walk, when they have the urge to harm themselves. They may also be told to avoid having the objects they use to harm themselves within easy reach. People who rely on habitual self-harm are sometimes psychiatrically hospitalised, based on their stability, and their ability and especially their willingness to get help.
why would you hurt yourself? no one benefits from that!
You need to remind yourself about those 6 weeks you DIDN'T hurt yourself, and then go and talk with your counselor. You can't beat this on your own. find something or somthing that wants you.like a boyfriend or a sport activity. that way you will feel important about yourself, i barely know you and weather i hate u or not there is no reason to hurt yourself, your to important to do that kind of stuff. or, if that doesn't work, turn to god and read the bible.
You should really go to see someone even though you already saw a doctor. Try thinking about something else or making up a Hobie.i don't know just something that gets you mind relaxed.
I suggest that you consult a therapist who specialize in treating people who self harm.
Possible solutions:
1. Get a hobby. Find something that you like to do and focus on that. It seems you may have too much time on your hands. Try and keep busy as much as you can.
2. Look forward to the future. Look forward to a college education. Strive for it. College isn't for everyone but it is a life changing experience that has often helped people to come out of their shells and experience life for the first time.
3. I would try and get help from a homeopathic doctor. Often times, they succeed where a traditional one fails.
4. Think about the good in your life and focus on that. Be happy and grateful for what you have and be happy you aren't in Darfur.
See "depression" on site below for info on how diet can affect it. Takes 5 minutes to read. Then see 'Rx for Life" which will help you immediately with practical things to feel better over time. Also for cutting there is info on this on "Advice for Teenage Girls" page. Avoid negative people.
I don't pretend to understand self-harm, but I do understand the spiral that self-doubt and lack of self-worth can start you upon.
I can't tell you why you do these things or how you can stop doing them but I can tell you this: there are two options you can take, firstly decide you've let yourself down, dwell on it, see it as another failure convince yourself that you'll never beat it and harm yourself daily again OR you can look at what you've done, accept it, don't beat yourself up about it and put it behind you, realise that everyone fails to completely live up to the targets they set themselves and forgive yourself and keep on working towards your ultimate goal of stopping the self-harm.
As I said, it's not a solution or an insight to the cause but it is a way of forgiving yourself and not just abandoning the achievements you have made.
Good luck
As with any addiction when you fall of the wagon it lets what I like the call the DEVIL in your head, a chance to tell you to just give up then and do what you want your never do any thing any way, sound familiar? I am not religious but this is something in out psychology that wants us to do things against are benefit and that doesn’t make sense, he may sound like you and he may be your best friend and just wants you to be happy but don’t listen to him get strait back on the wagon and take one day at a time its not the finish line on your death bed that counts it every day fighting the temptation, love, I did it, you can too Some types of medication makes your urge to cut even more like Xanax and some other anti-anxiety tablets. I find if you keep yourself preoccupied and just keep your mind off it. I know how hard it is to stop cutting, you have to face the withdrawal syndromes and you wonder whether it's really worth it. But feeling happy without cutting yourself is the greatest joy anyone can have. Trust me on it. Because cutting yourself, you get a happy sensation, yeah, but it's not real. If you experience true joy, you will never cut again. It helps if you talk out about your self-harm and tell others why they shouldn't do it, once you talk to other people about why they have to stop cutting, you just practising it on yourself. And everytime you feel the urge to cut and you don't, reward yourself. Swimming, writting, talking also helps whenever you feel like cutting. before you cut, just try and analyze what is it that makes you want to cut in the first place and just try and fix it. Self harm is just gonna ruin your life, trust me. I thought it was my best-friend who was always there for me whenever things got rough, but the truth is, I made me loss friends, my nervous system, my family, my education, my joy and my sanity. Please just stop.
well doen for the 6 weeks sweety, that was excellent.
everyone has set backs when recovering, two steps forward three steps back, its alway the case.
Dont think of yourdelf any less, just think i have done it for 6 weeks, now i will do it for, lets say, 2 months.
yes you may have set backs but that will only push you even harder the next time.
sweety you are strong and you must realise that, that is the reason why not to harm yourself, because you are worth more then what you think.
and when you are recovered you dont want those memories ingraved on your arm, you want to forget about them and move on, and cutting yourself is not going to help.
i hope that helps hello hunny, first things first i know exactly were your coming from because i didnt self harm for weeks and then the last three days ive ended up in hospital 3 times. i wish i could talk to you face to face cos then i would get a picture of you in my head. when you do self harm DO NOT look at it as a failure cos its not. its a minor set back and you will get through it. you might not think so but you will. ive been selfharming now for 10 years and ive just come off a section. i was locked up for 4 years and im out but i do still selfharm. have you tried ice, now thats a good one if you feel like cutting. hold the ice where you want to cut and place it on the skin.it really hurts but through experience and reasearch shows it gives off the same brain chemicals that cutting does. also there is an elstic band, put it on your wrist asnd then when you want to cut you ping it. these are only a few ideas but when your at your lowest eb try these and remember its not a failure its just a blip and dont beat yourself up about it. i wish you all the best and dont be afraid to ask for more tips. when youve not selfharmed congratulate yourself coz believe me hunny i know how hard it is.
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