What do you say to someone who is starving themselves?


Question:
Ok, heres the deal. She started starving herself after her father died when she was in the eighth grade. She was never even chubby, but yet she just wouldn't be happy. It wasn't as major at first, like she would just eat one meal a day for a week before a party or something. But the summer before she started high school she ate one tiny meal a day and got down to 120 pds (shes 5'11) which is very very thin. And its got worse over the years. She's about to be a senior and now doesn't eat a bite of anything for 3 days at a time and when she does eat its like a few carrots. I've tried everything I know and she's been to counseling also but she said it was just a joke and they don't know how she feels (she had it really rough growing up). What can I do? She's destroying her body and can't even take a normal shower because she gets to where she can't breathe..help please.

Answers:
Food isn't the issue, it's a consequence. She needs help in discovering the real issues that are buried deep down inside her and sorting those out for once and for all.

First of all though, she needs to want help otherwise no matter how much you worry and want to help, you won't have a clue.

I think you need to tell her straight, if she doesn't sort herself out she is going to make herself infertile, lose all her hair, look awful and at the very worst, die. If this doesn't work perhaps it is time to get someone else to talk to her.

Good luck.

Other Answers:
"Are you hungry?"

give her a big mac meal one thing you could do is take yoga with her.
she has disconnected with her body and it would help.
she needs a lot of help, but that's something you could do.


You can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped. Sorry it's harsh, but it's true. tell her she is relay selfish!


Fancy a steak ?


Can I have the food in your fridge?

come on! you have to eat something. What you should do is:

Send her pictures of poor Children in Africa that doesn't have any parent and they still want to eat

punishing herself only makes it worst..tell her the truth about the world

she is not the only one person in here that has that problem..but the solution is not to die by not eating


GET HER HELP!! She is anorexic. If she won't eat, will she drink. If she is not drinking 64 ounces of water a day, and refuses to believe that is healthy, then she may not accept smoothies from you either.

However, if she will drink stuff you give her, get a smoothie maker and soy protein powder and start making smoothies that includes the protein powder. Even if they are ice cream smoothies. If she will accept nutrition from you, that would be great.

There is plenty of information about anorexia on the web, and may be plenty of organizations for persons who know anorexics, and want to know what to do.

For yourself, check out www.hufa.org, as it might help explain (at least why I think) why she is refusing food.


She has to help herself. Support her all you can,but in the end she has to hit bottom and climb back up if she has the strength. OK. Little and often.
find out what her favourite food is, cook it up and liquidise it all together. Get an ice cube tray and put the food into the compartments and freeze. Get one cube out at a time, defrost and let her have what she wants throughout the day.
because it is such a small amount, her tummy will be able to cope with it and she shouldn't have the desire to purge herself.

I hope that this is of some help to you, most of all patience is required from all who are around her. May medical intervention is needed if this fails. Good luck my friend, you have a long and rocky road ahead of you.


this behaviour is not going to be broken without professional help. it has become a way of surviving as strange as that seems to everyone else. you can't help and that's a tough thing for you so your only choice is whether to stick around and accept it or not. unless this person wants and seeks help they won't budge. the eating disorder does her thinking like a drug. you can contact eating disorders organisations which you will find online and they can give you proper support and advice. this person has a mental illness and you are not wrong to be very worried but you are more worried than she is!




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