Serious question for recovering alcoholics and addicts only! I have know a girl for about?

Question: three years who has been in and out of AA for 21 years... she claims she had five years sobriety early on, but has never been able to do it again...she has drank three times since I knew her, and she has been on pills for over two years since I knew her but I did not know...she lied and said she was not...In january she got caught at her drinking and admitted she had been drinking for two months...it was also discovered she had been taking xanax, hydrocodene, and oxycodone...she claimed she quit these things in Jan again when she went to a two month outpatient rehab...but it was discovered that she only quit for a couple of months...she got caught again by us using these pills again a couple of nights ago...she is now in a rehab ...I also need to point out that all the time I knew here she was going to AA, but most of the time she was using pills...What should I do at this point to help...I feel most any help I give her will be enabling...also both her parents died within ten months

Answers:
The program works for people who want it, not for people who need it! She's not ready yet. The only thing you can really do is be there for her when she comes back. Don't jeopardize your own sobriety. Remember, "Our primary purpose is to stay sober, and help the alcoholic who still suffers".

Other Answers:
jonny walker to the store

---

AA obviously doesnt help her if she's been going for 21 years. She really needs to want to do it herself or no amount of help will help her. I think she needs counselling, she obviously has underlying problems which cause her to fall back into these habits time and again.

---

if she was already using drink etc as a crutch before her parents died then that will have knocked her right off her feet again. Sounds like your doing your best but the sad fact is unless she wants to give everything up for just her and not to please others it wont work. Try and show patience and do your best not to lecture because one of the ways that addiction works is you feel awful,depressed self loathing and major guilt so people keep doing it as it provides a temporary block to all feeling , your friend has to get to the point herself where shes had enough. its easy to quit, so much harder to stay quit. Another factor is the physical reliance if shes been doing it for that long. Sorry if i've not been much help had experience with addiction and helping others get over theirs. all you can do is keep trying

---

The problem with addicts is that they aren't just addicted to one thing. Most addicts have addictive personalities. When your friend tried to give up alcohol, she traded one addiction for another. Pills, smoking, gambling, etc. are all easy replacements for the thing that they're giving up.

You're correct in that help you give her will be enabling. She has to help herself. Unless you're signed on as her sponsor, attempting to intervene on her behalf isn't going to do her any good.

---

YOU SHOULD ADVISE THIS GIRL THAT SHE IS SPIRALING OUT OF CONTROL AND THAT SHE SHOULD SEEK OUT A GOOD THERAPIST AND JOIN A DUEL-DIAGNOSIS SUPPORT GROUP. YOU NEED TO DISTANCE YOUR SELF FROM THIS PERSON UNTIL SHE IS STABLE. ONLY SHE HAS THE POWER TO GET AND STAY WELL. YOU NEED TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF 1ST.AS YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR STABILITY AND SOBRIETY. BEST OF LUCK TO YOU ! KEEP THE FAITH.

---

you must have serious problem you asked this question twice...were you drunk when you asked it? I always say drunk chicks are easy so go for it dude.

---

---

More Questions and Answers

• what activities are good for patients with dementia, toys etc?
• Serotonin making food?
• depression?
• Do you ever feel like you are a mental case?
• How can I get over it? It hurts so much?
• Why are some people such a**holes?
• What am I experiencing at night? Are they panic attacks?
• Dreams of being suffocated by oversized spiders and boa consrictors (read on)?