My boyfriend is moody, has a low sex drive, likes to be alone alot, and is very guarded, what's wrong?
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I am not a therapist but your bf needs one. There are a number of disorder's he "could" be suffering from. No therapy will work unless a change is wanted by the person afflicted. I think I remember you saying that you have discussed this and his answer was no. It sounds to me you are searching for much more in your relationship and you are not getting it now. If this is truly what you said than I would suggest you try communicating with him one more time. If there is no change I believe you are incompatible and you need to walk away. As long as he is comfortable with your present relationship and does not want ,or need to change, to use you; he probably won't. You sound like a caring concerned human being. You need more? You want more? Go and get it. I wish you well..
Other Answers:
Maybe he is depressed or is bipolar? Has he been diagnosed with anything yet?
Yeah, ever think the guy might be on drugs? Or he may be have a bi-polar disorder? Drugs would be my first guess due to the lower libido. if he doesnt want to do dont make him
Boredom in the bedroom perhaps? Things do become same old same old.
Sounds like he might be clinically depressed. You need to talk him into seeing a doctor or therapist
he's probably not over his ex.
its not you.
some guys are just like that.
give him some time.
sounds like pot.
Maybe that is just who he is and if you want to change it you aren't right for each other. If he seems happy to be this way then he isn't the one with the problem. ON the other hand if he seems unhappy with his life then perhaps he is depressed and needs professional help. Again the real question is.. Is he happy with the way his life is? IF he is and you aren't then the problem is yours not his.
Also hear what he is saying. He does not want kids or marriage. He is being clear about where he does not want your relationship to go. Don't hang around thinking he'll change his mind if those are things you really want, dont waste both of your time. If it is meant to be and you move on then he will change what he needs to change on his own to meet your needs as well as his. You can not force someone else to change they have to do it on their own.
he sounds depressed I would say he is a loner..afraid to get too close..afraid of getting hurt, maybe? Maybe he's not into you like you are into him. What does he say he feels for you? If you need more, you need to move on.
Wow! That kinda sounds like me. Is he attracted to you? He might have intimacy issues.
well i am very single right now so maybe i shouldn't answer. but have you talked to him about it? Theres a first step. why are you going out with him if he doesn't want a commitment 'cause it sounds like you do.
People are who they are. The odds of changing someone into a completely different person are extremely thin.
Successful relationships are built by either accepting the person for who they primarily are, or recognizing that the person isn't the right match for you. It sounds like, to me, that you would have to change this person too drastically to get him to be the boyfriend you truly want him to be. Maybe it's time to contemplate a different future?
Are you sure you aren't dating my ex-boyfriend? :-)
Well, it sounds very much like your boyfriend is depressed. He should talk to a doctor. I wish you luck. Oh, and if he is adamant about not wanting to get married or have children don't fight him on that. It won't be worth your time to fight him on this. Even if you win the fight you could end up with a husband who doesn't want to be married, and your children will have a father who doesn't want to be a father.
You are with the wrong guy! He has no desire for a commitment -- EVER! He has told you that, and you need to believe him. You could get stuck with him for years, and he would still not commit. Do not even think that you can change him or his way of thinking. It doesn't happen!
There are plenty of great guys out here that would love to meet someone like you, and have no fear of commitment.
It works the same way the other way around. I recently dated a wonderful woman, but she kept missing her old boyfriend who also said he would never commit. They were dating for 12 years! She finally dumped him, but couldn't get over him, so now she is just wating for him to change his mind and take her back, with a commitment of marriage. It just won't happen!
Sorry to put it that way, but I don't want to see you throw years away, just to be broken-hearted. You seem to be too sweet to end up lonely after years of hoping.
Good luck!
It could be that he was abused in some way in his life time and it is coming out in such a way that he doesn't know how to deal with it or still does not recognize the problem. Ask him to consider the two of you going to a social worker qualified to talk this through. YOU CAN NOT FIX THIS ALONE.
Good Luck
he may be depressed or even schizophrenic.
if you are going for an antidepressant don't use Zoloft on him.it has sexual side effects. use wellbutrin xl it has a low risk of sexual side effects..
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