Hi, my question is this..... Beside myself has anyone ever si(self-injury) if so how do u cope w/this?
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yes, i used too. i am 42 years old now. i was in high school the first time i ever did it. i took my protracter and carved the word why into my arm. i didnt do it again until i was 21 and i started drinking really heavy. i would buy double edge razors and cut my arms and hands. i also attepted to kill myself this way. the reason i did it was because i hurt so much inside i think i needed to let it out. this made more sense to me. i was wounded, it hurt, i was bleeding, or perhaps i was punishing myself too. i did this for several years. i had no self esteem. i had panic attacks and eventually agoraphobia. i self medicated with alcohol and methamphetemine. i not only was a cutter i lived life on the edge. i overdosed several times too. what finally got me help, was i hooked up with a therapist who helped me start processing things through my heart. i was always scrambling around in my head, intellectualizing and racing and joking and evading and she told me if i kept it up i wold melt down again. that by connecting to my heart i would complete the circuit the body is designed for. it was everything i needed and had been avoiding. i am okay. i am clean and sober. i quit cutting years ago. even before the therapy. i think medication helped.alcohol was definatly behind every episode for me and their were hundreds. if i could tell you anything, try to talk to some one, i know through your pain it may seem vain to talk about the physical aspects of this thing, but i have to live with these horrific scars for the rest of my life. everywhere i go. everyone i meet. long sleeves. or explanations. i am branded. battlescars. i am okay with me. i have no problem talking about it but other people have judgements or just discomfort. my prayers are going out to you as i sit here right now. because ultimately my higher power has put me on a path of light and shown me unconditional love, and that is something i had never experienced before. it is the most healing thing i have ever felt in my life, and to want to feel is a miracle
Yeah, sometimes I make deep scratches into myself or burn myself. I know it's bad but it really is addictive.
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