Mentally disabled husband's behaviors drive me crazy and I don't want a divorce.?

Question:

I married a man who is mentally disabled - I married him 5 years ago. I would have run the other way had I known about it. I fell in love & married after 2 yrs of dating. Time has progressed his illnesses; he has improved with meds and therapy; but not a lot. He lies, takes things, and hides things that he does. He is not physically abusive & he would do anything I ask him except tell the truth - & when he does tell the truth, I find it hard to believe him. I get so irritated at him at times, I am besides myself. Other times, he is fun and I love being around him. Divorce is not an option due to beliefs. How can I take care of myself and keep my money, meds, & personal information away from him without him finding it? I know this sounds crazy, and I guess it is, but I made a bad choice in marrying him, but I have to make the consequences of the decision bearable for me to live with. Any suggestions? I am taking an anti-depressant but it doesn't control my anxiety.

Answers:
unlike some of the other people I want to commend you for staying with your husband. Some people just don't take marriage very seriously anymore. You said he's not always like this so you can see him for who he is without the disability and you've already seen that or I doubt you would have fallen in love with him in the first place. I think the suggestion to find a support group and to go to the doctor was a really good suggestion. Also, do you have a video camera? If you do, try video taping your fun times together with him... make a whole video of the good times... that way when you're really frustrated you can watch it and be reminded of who he really is under this disease. I bet if he could change this he could. It is for better or for worse... you're just going through the worse right now... if he doesn't abuse you or cheat on you than I think he deserves your support. Try find a girlfriend you can talk to when you can't talk to your husband.

I hope everything works out for you and your husband.

If he really is diagnosed, then you have every right to take control of the
family finances, put him on an allowance, etc.

You need to figure out just what the illness is and protect yourself and yours.
Its going to be a pretty major ego killer for him, but ... that's the illness.

Good luck!

First off, thats rediculous you dont belive in divorce. SO you think god or whoever you believe in , would rather you be depressed on meds, hate life and be shitty and unfullfilling everyday, That is the dumbest thing i ever heard. God <or whomeever> should be all loving, They except people who kill 40 people and forgive them but god forbid you get a divorce!!! Thats stupid, get a divorce, or move out and run away, and dont divorce him, just leave. You dont have to get a divorce to leave him. You cant deal with that crap your whole life. and more power to ya if you really even want to.

More Questions and Answers

The consumer health information on youqa.com is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for medical advice or treatment for any medical conditions.
The answer content post by the user, if contains the copyright content please contact us, we will immediately remove it.

Mentally disabled husband's behaviors drive me crazy and I don't want a divorce.?

Health Resources