Why do I do this? And how can I stop?

Question:

I have no idea why in relationships with people I always expect the worst. I always expect them to not like me and if they show it I think they're pretending or they're just trying to be polite. Even with my parents! I feel sometimes that what if they wanted another child? or after they had me they didnt really like me. I know its crazy but thats the way I sometimes think. I like myself alright and I have no major self esteem problems so I dont know why I just find it so hard to believe that somebody likes me genuinly. This is annoying me even more now that I'm in this relationship and I guess the guy is trying to show me that he likes me alot or even love me but I cant get myself to believe that and trust that. I ignore the signs he gives me and I dont let myself get them and I always say to myself..oh he doesnt love you ofcourse not he's just trying to be nice.. like I'm so protective and scared of a heartbreak so I dont even try to believe that I could be liked. Whats up with that?

Answers:
Hi,

You are not alone.A vast majority of humans think like this and make their own lives miserable.Only difference is in the degree.
I too had this problem.I am a 39 year old male. Luckily I read a book that pointed out the effect that thinking can have on our life and destiny. I got a remedy : Positive self talk. When you start repeating it, you will catch yourself making those degrading statements about yourself. See, if someone told you : "Hey, Beautiful ! You look great !" you would feel good dont you ?Then why cant you tell that to you yourself ? You will notice that your body language, posture etc become more positive and confident as you start using the self talk.

The mind has been conditioned very heavily in your childhood, and each time you repeat those degrading remarks to yourself, you are reinforcing that negative conditioning. Better get started on working on your self talk this moment !

All the best !

" Take it easy! " :) Be relaxed n trust urself, this is the first step.

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Why do I do this? And how can I stop?

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