Agitated, Frustrated, full of rage....what can I do to get this under control?

Question:

I have a common problem; I get extremely annoyed with my father, and my father only. I can't tell whether it's meaningless or I have some deep issues with him, but whatever the case I try to convince him it's nothing and that he shouldn't worry about it. I have trouble hiding the fact that I want to kick his face in or scream whenever he's around. So, he (rightfully) gets the impression that I'm agitated or annoyed any given time he tries to talk to me.
How do I deal with this rage? I really don't see the two of us resolving whatever makes me 'hate' him so much, but I do care about him and wish I could be a bit more personable. I need a way to either calm down, or be a really good actress...because I can't continue getting so pissed and there's no way I'm discussing with him why I get so annoyed and frustrated. Any suggestions, other than telling him how I feel? Trust me, I've tried before. It doesn't work.

Answers:
There are so many vietnam vets who is just like your father...they cannot talk about their experiences over there...it was terrible...Have you read any books on the vietnam war? A lot of vets become alcoholics as well because of what they experienced in that terrible war. I think I can understand exactly why you are angry, frustrated and everything you are talking about. Your father lost himself in the vietnam war...he is not the man he was before that war. I dont know if there is any help for him because I have met many vietnam vets who are near vegetative states. I have read books about the vietnam war, but I have never spoken to a soldier who was over there...no-one talk about their experiences. I think I would hate to be a family member of a vietnam vet because their whole reality...their whole life was changed. The Government at the time forced people to go to Vietnam to fight. Youngs guys who didnt want to go were made to go. You know when they came back from the war, they were spat upon, they were considered not human. Unlike WWI and WWII veterans who walked down the street proudly when they came back from the war...the vietnam vets were hated. I think this has everything to do with why your father is the way he is. I dont know if there are any answers for him...he needs professional help to get over whatever it was he experienced.

I think the only thing you can do is read up everything you can about the vietnam war and try to see things from his perspective. Or maybe you will just have to leave for your own sanity's sake. Living with an alcoholic at the best of times is near impossible...living with a vietnam vet who is an alcoholic is even harder. Dont be too hard on yourself....I certainly can understand why you would feel everything you are feeling.

Counseling. Something is going on here, and you need some professional help to get over it....and to figure out how to be around your father in a better way.

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Agitated, Frustrated, full of rage....what can I do to get this under control?

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