Whats wrong with me?1?

Question:

Im a 21 year old loser
I have 0 friends
no support
No Health insurance
my parents are idiots
I have heart problems.
I think i might be getting dumber by the day, or it could be that im "just" depressed. I really cant tell. There have been times in the past few months that ive felt lightheaded for about half an hour after waking up.. im a little scared.. is my bad heart getting to my brain?? Ive always been kinda dumb.. I think Ive just been less focused because im depressed, thus dumber, but i dont know

I just turned 21.. Woo. I went out with my parents to celebrtate.. hows that for a big 21st b-day!

Btw all the things i just said i would never tell anyone close to me. Respond however you like.. I actually find most insults funny :-P

Answers:
Hmm. I don't know if this is a cry for help or just a need to validate your self-deprication.

First of all, you may not have health insurance, but there exists medicaid or your county health system, which is extremely low-cost. You can receive health care, even with a condition. Please look into that.

I was you once. I was 21, fat, ugly, friendless, poor, at the mercy of life. I'm 26 now. I'm beautiful, seeing someone, have good friends, good insurance, and live far away from mother (thank God). What happened between the three suicide attempts, hospitalization, and medication, was the belief that I finally was not any of those things. My problem is that I made most of my problems up. I thought I was ugly so I dressed ugly. I was fat, but I refused to take a walk around the block a few times. I kept feeding the anger and hatred within myself.

I hope you live in an area that has a mental help chat line, the kind that has counselors to talk with 24/7. Because...and this pains me to say this...if you keep this up...you will die a senseless death. If you keep stressing about the horrors of another day (my opinion of why you're dizzy) and willingly try and see what happens when you finds solutions for your issues, believe you might have a chance.

If you don't do this for yourself, do it for the friends you have yet to meet after you get better.

smoke a doobie, you'll feel better

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Whats wrong with me?1?

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