Complicated but yeah... also, my thing is wierd cause i couldn't say everything i needed, soz?

Question:

i have suffered from depression since 6th grade (thats when i started feeling horrible, diagnosed in 8th grade when i began cutting and now i'm in 11th grade). So my parents (& friends) know that i have cut & mst probly know i still do. i have been feeling crappy lately but dont know who to tell. My friends arent sensitive and say i want attention, like feeling tough or something, or that i am just weak. I told one something deep and she tried to tell others. As for my parents, i trust my ma the most (she also has depression) but in the past (like 4 diff. times) i told her i wanted to die, she asked why, how i would, but she never brout it up again & she brushed it off, so i feel nothing constructive will come from telling her. She has been with her friend who also has problems, which makes me mad cause i feel like she obsesses over her but pushes me aside (she is at her house alot). I am on my 3rd type of meds (welbutrin) & i'm feeling horrible but cant tell anyone, so what do i do?

Answers:
I know how painful it must be for you. I suffered from depression from an early age and it seems to have actually been bipolar disorder. Same for my now 16 year old daughter. When she began cutting, fortunately she told me about it the same day. Her step-dad and I took it very seriously and brought her to an adolescent psychiatric ward. This helped her initially until a few months later when she wanted to go back there. We realized it was to avoid dealing with the lack of friends and all the pressure and pain of functioning daily and feeling nothing.

All that to say that the thing that helped us both the most was learning to change how we perceive things. When you're depressed, it becomes natural to see everything negatively. If your parents can find you someone who is familiar with Dr. David Burns' "The feeling good handbook" and will help you use it, I strongly recommend that.

I understand your concern over ppl thinking you're attention seeking. My own family has said that about me and my daughter's friends have said that of her. That is painful to hear, but it's not important. More important is getting help. I understand your not wanting to use the same therapist as your brother.

As for your mother, I'm going to guess that it's so much easier for her to help her friend that it is to deal with her own and her own family's mental health issues. That doesn't excuse her though. If you go to another therapist, I would bring that up and see if the therapist can help you address the issue with your mom. I feel for you that your mother doesn't check to see if you've improved, nor does she act on your suicidal desire. She really should take it seriously. Try the school nurse, counsellor or teacher. SOMEONE must be able to help you.

Medication-wise, it is difficult to medicate youths with depression under the age of 18 as there's been little or no research done. It is important to know that medication accounts for only 20% of recovering from depression. Therapy is the most helpful, once you find someone you're comfortable with opening up to.

I don't know if you believe in God or not, but that has helped both my daughter and me in improving and becoming more mentally balanced.

I pray you find someone to hear and help you.

Other Answers:
are you getting therapy or just one meds?? you have stop caring about what others think and start caring for yourself before you do something to get the help you need. can you get any help at school teachers or help groups?

tell the people that u trust and love. if u dont it will only eat at you and make u feel alone and worse.

Sounds like you need a different medicine and to tell your mom honestly how you feel and don't hold it in. Your friends do not seem supportive, you need to find supportive buds. Maybe try a new doctor too or try alternative/natural medicine.

aww, omg sweetie, i think i have the same thing. i'm in 8th grade by the way i'm in 8th grade. please mail me to talk about it, i can be you shoulder to cry on. =) good luck

Hon, I went through a similar situation with my mom. It told her a ton of times and she still wouldn't believe me and people close to me thought I was doing it for attention. I told my doctor and she really helped me. It turned out both me and my mom have depression. I was on a variety of medicines including welbutrin. It didn't seem to help me..but there are a ton of medicines out there for depression..stick with it and you'll find the one that is right for you. A friend of mine just went on cymbalta and it is really helping her. Maybe that could help. *hugs* You're not alone!!

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Complicated but yeah... also, my thing is wierd cause i couldn't say everything i needed, soz?

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