Is it normal to be extremely fearful of children?
Question:
3 years ago I was engaged to be married and didn't seem to have this problem, but ever since then I've avoided children to such a degree that I will literally walk around them or avoid social situations or crowds where children might be present in large numbers (e.g. schools, nurseries, etc.).
It is not so much who they are (e.g. children) as it is their energy level and hyperactivity. Just today I was eating out and a little girl walked up to me in the buffet line and said,"Excuse me,sir" because I was accidentally standing in her way and didn't know she was there.
I literally moved back at least half a foot and was so shocked by her sudden appearance that she herself seemed startled.
What could be the causes of this phobia and how do I defeat it?
Paul
Answers:
Fear of children: An abnormal and persistent fear of babies and children. Sufferers experience anxiety even though they realize their fear is groundless. Rearing a child or being around active children can both produce anxiety.
Fear of children is termed "pedophobia," a word derived from the Greek "pais" (child) and "phobos" (fear).
What is the cause of Pedophobia?
Like all fears and phobias, pedophobia is created by the unconscious mind as a protective mechanism. At some point in your past, there was likely an event linking children and emotional trauma. Whilst the original catalyst may have been a real-life scare of some kind, the condition can also be triggered by myriad, benign events like movies, TV, or perhaps seeing someone else experience trauma.
But so long as the negative association is powerful enough, the unconscious mind thinks: "Ahh, this whole thing is very dangerous. How do I keep myself from getting in this kind of situation again? I know, I'll attach terrible feelings to children, that way I'll steer clear in future and so be safe." Just like that pedophobia is born. Attaching emotions to situations is one of the primary ways that humans learn. Sometimes we just get the wiring wrong.
The actual phobia manifests itself in different ways. Some sufferers experience it almost all the time, others just in response to direct stimuli. Everyone has their own unique formula for when and how to feel bad.
It's your thinking patterns that cause the feelings of fear. You know you don't have pedophobia when you are focussed on other things. To overcome pedophobia it is your thinking that must change. ONLY YOU can CHANGE YOUR THINKING.
Seek support, Paul ;)
Other Answers:
Maybe you need professional help.
get a shrink. That's not normal and you're not going to resolve it simply by reading answers here.
Its not "normal" but its not BAD. All people have SOMETHING that freaks them out or makes them cringe, and yours happens to be children. I would go talk to a therapist. (If you feel like its affecting you in a very bad way) Something much deeper could be bothering you.
Wow.Were you and your fiancee planning on having children?Did she have any?Maybe you are depressed and that's the reason you can't handle high energy levels.I think the best thing to do would be to see a doctor.
you should seek profesional help!! children are great! and cute, funny. go talk to someone.
Source(s):
a mother of 3
causes could be extreme commitment problems, bad childhood experiences, severe and/or embarrassing recent experiences involving a child that could've possibly affected you in this way.
it's good that you've taken your first step to defeating it by actually admitting it. now you should see a shrink and don't waste a minute of your time there.
baby, get some profession help, you're missing out of one of the greatest gifts, children are a joy. to bad we cant be more like them.
u need help right away whats a child going to do to u
If I was you Go Ask Dr Fill for help. WHo knows there is prob more people out there who have the same prob like you and dont know what to do. Bring this to TV and who knows how many others you will be helping when you are getting help your self on tv.
Sounds like you have major issues and are in serious need of professional help. Find a good therapist, and stick with it until you can face children again. I get the sense that something happened with your engagement; the two may very well be related! Best of luck!
You're definitely suffering from a phobia. As others have said, phobias are not at all unusual or abnormal, but if your phobia is affecting an area of your life- social, personal, or family- you should seek professional help. You mention changing your routine to avoid children- this certainly qualifies as interfering with your life.
As far as why you may have developed this phobia so suddenly, different schools of psychological thought have different theories. It may have been triggered by a traumatic incident you were involved in around that time- you may not consciously associate the incident with children, but maybe there were children nearby or the incident occured near a school or playground? Another (very Freudian) possibility is that the thought of getting married led to the thought of having children, and this caused you so much anxiety that you developed a generalized fear of children. If that's the case, talking to your partner honestly about plans for having children may help a little (although at this point I still recommend professional help). If neither of these sound accurate to you, however, it may be something as simple as a diet or lifestyle change that affected your brain's chemistry. In any case, the best course of action is to visit a psychologist, psychiatrist, or your family doctor (who can refer you as necessary). Good luck!
Try these natural relaxation techniques
"BEING IN CONTROL:Natural Techniques For Increasing Your Potential And Creativity For Success In School"
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/9659025114/
That is not normal behavior and you should seek a psychologist.
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