Am i "depressed"??


Question:
ok so im a bit wary of putting this all up here but i dont know where else to turn.
I hate my life.
I lost my job.
Im in debt up to my eyeballs (ive tried Debt management companies but i cant eve afford their repayments!)
My partner does nothing but annoy me
I dont get on with my parents (never have)
I hate where i live
Sometimes i wish id never had my daughter who is nearly 2
I hate looking in a mirror
I hate even seeing my name written down
I just want to stop it all and have a fresh start..
When i go to the Drs, i break down and i just dont tell them half of what is in my head, coz i know im taking up their time and prob dont want to see a 27 year old woman in floods of tears in their office.
Im scared that if i do tell them everything they will lock me up as a complete loon.
WHat should i do?

Answers:
yes, it sounds like you are depressed. maybe you could think about counceling. it might help to just talk to someone about your problems.
talk to someone.you need to get how you feel out in the open with someone not connected to you. if you dont feel comfortable talking to a doctor about this, you could try the samaritans, or even a counseller. bottling it all up like this will do you no good at all (trust me). speak to someone impartial and then eventually when you have got your head around these issues you will be able to discuss things with your family/partner/friends.

with the debts, try talking to the citizens advice bureau.they may be able to help.

you're not a loon.you just have a hell of a lot on your plate.

good luck

ps. in my view dont take medication for this.that will only be tackling the symptom not the problem
Don't tell the doctors all your thoughts no way! You must hold back but the word they are looking for is
Depressed
It would be perfectly acceptable to say, "Doc I've been feeling so depressed lately do you know of anything that can help me?"
Antidepressants could be the answer for you as they are for alot of people and YOU deserve and your SWEET, SWEET innocent child deserves to feel your absolute love and adoration reflected back at her when she is looking to you for approval, NOT regret!

Your child deserves the best of you and if you can't do it on your own DON'T you dare put your pride ahead of your own child. Get on antidepressants. The key to finding a cure for your depression is to keep trying different meds.UNTIL..okay
Good luck babe!
:)
Read Alice Miller's Dance of Anger. It is really helpful. You also might want to try some meds to get you motivated again and once the ball is rolling, you can be happier about the life choices you've made. You might make new friends and that will help a lot.
they wont think your a loony at all. That is was depression does. My sister was feeling like she could actually kill somebody, how loony is that! No seriously though you really do need to go get help from your GP, they will refer you to the relevant person. Trust me your not the only person that's broke down in the doctors room. This kind of problem needs professional help otherwise it will only get worse.
Weather or not you can give your self the official label of "depression " is irelevant .

You certainly have a great deal of aspects to your life that are giving you some level of discontment .

Alot of these things would become more manageable if you had some to talk to about this stuff .

My advice is ..

No 1 .. Talk to someone .
No 2 ...write down the problems that YOU have some control over in your diary and set yourself some time to try and solve them . this may take time .
No 3 ... Write down the problems that you have NO control over and then when you have done that , place that peice of paper in the bin
No 4 ..Write down that things in your life that your happy and proud about , .,when youve done this .. place it close to you . maybe in your purse or bag or something like that ,,,


When your in the poo .. keep moving . it will get better ..
Ya that is definatley deppression. Was it a certain event that started all this or has it been pretty consitent through out your life. Their are different kinds of depressions and they each can be treated but you really need to explain every detail to the psych so he can either prescribe you the right kind of medication or counsling. Good luck to you.
You sound like you're having a really rough time, I really sorry to here that ::hugs::

Anyone would feel down going through what you're going through, ask your doctor for a referral to a psychologist if you feel you can't talk to him/her. All health professionals are here to help and will take the time to do this. I hope you find one you feel you can open up to. They won't lock you up because you're depressed unless you are "a danger to yourself, or others".

I've include a couple of links below. These are online tests which can help you to diagnose if it is depression. These aren't a substitute for a doctor, though : )

There are a lot of support groups on the Internet where you can talk to people who have been through (and are going through) what you are, and can offer lots of really good advice and coping strategies.

Take care of yourself and your little girl. I'm sending lots of positive vibes your way - it gets better, it really does : )
first thing is first please try to calm down , no wonder you are feeling depressed you have had alot of crap in your life there is nothing wrong with been depressed as long as you get help , everyone at some time in there life does. find out weather you doctors have a councillor from my pass experience doctors don't really help from what you have said i think you are but you are , the one that can help the most is you try to make the decision that you don't want to carry on like this talk to someone and get help . the fresh start could start right now it WILL get better you have everything to live for if i can help let me know i was depressed for years until i maded the decision that bloody life is to short and i am buggered if i am going to waste it xxxx
oh ..my heart goes out to you ..yes you are depressed .please go to the doctors again and tell them everything ..you really need help .if you feel you cant say everything you want to the doctor .write it all down and give it to the doctor when you arrive .it is never easy to admit we need help .it is often that we feel concerned that people wont understand ..or feel we are weak ...you are not alone there are many who suffer the same feelings ....lets us all know how you get on ...
It sounds like you are gong through some tough times and need to evaluate what you really want out of life. What can you let go of, and what is really important to you? It's easy to feel sad and frustrated when you don't feel as though you're moving forward in life. You'd be amazed at what finding a goal and taking steps towards it can do for your whole outlook.

It's good to talk to someone, but this is really more about you being honest with yourself. You need to know that you have the ultimate control over your life experience. You need to know that the bad things in your life aren't so bad because you chose them. There is a reason for every choice we make. If the reason isn't worth it, make a different choice.
Doesn't your GP employ a cpn to whom you can talk for as long as you want Has your GP asked you to fill in a questionairre about how you fell either pqh9 or a HAD score would help him diagnose you. Go back with everything you have said here written down and Gps are used to people crying or you could go and see the practice nurse
your not loon,we all go true hard time,s.i am in a job i dont like ,i am still at home with my mam and dad at 31.get some perfesonial help. talk to a money lender.
I wouldn't say so-This is all fixable-Depression is when you can't fix it-
I do think you are low and don't have anything good to aim for right now-
You have to turn it around
Being positive is a good start and so is asking for help-
However I wouldn't start taking anti-depressents cos that just hides what's going on-
Depression is an inverted state of mind-Being positive is the only thing to change it-
As for the debts and being out of work-If you don't own your home then I would recommend bankruptcy-Cos you will end up with bad credit anyway if you don't make the repayments-I did it and it changed my life-I got a fresh start.
Make changes and your life will feel so different-

I have 3 girls-In January I had to leave my home and alll our belongings cos my ex was violent-
I went into a refuge 200 miles away-
I got rehoused and started from scratch-
I was suffering from postnatal depression as baby was 5 months old and I'd recently seen a woman run over by 3 cars-
I cut off all contact with my ex,filed for divorce and bankruptcy-
Then I started thinking about what I wanted to do-The first thing was a holiday-so I saved up and took my girls away-Then I booked driving lessons-Bit by bit It all got clearer and I felt better.
I am now thinking about having a nice Xmas,my driving test is in 4 weeks and I'm going to start my law degree next year with the Open University.


You can do it !!
go see a doctor they wont lock you up,you need help and they can give it to you dont be afraid to tell them everything theyve heard it all before. good luck.
you need to talk to somebody if it is not the dr try the samaritans.With regards to your debt contact citizens advice and they will advise you accordingly.Dont give up though i saw somebody close to me in this situation and 15 years down the line she is free from debt and leads a very happy and secure life.good luck.
Darling, you're not a loon. You're just stressed to bits!

What you really need to do to start with is find yourself a new doctor! I'm not saying any doctors are bad..it's just that you need one that suits YOUR personality & needs!
Then you'll feel safe to tell all & know you won't be locked up.
Not that you would be if what you've written is the truth. I'd be bawling & climbing the walls in your situation too!
Hang on..I've been there! All except for the "I hate seeing my name written down"..I couldn't look.

I finally had a fab doctor who told me I was stressed & depressed rather than just writing me endless prescriptions for drugs that I would never fill. I denied depression (staunch cow!), so he just smiled, gave me a hug & a brochure to take home & read.
The following week I was back in his surgery & blubbing like a baby (stupid brochure)..very embarrassing!

My honey of a doctor spent the time with me discussing alternative treatments rather than racing straight into anti-depressants. We talked about my circumstances. In the end we agreed that I would take a 6-month course of anti-depressants & he referred me to a counsellor.

It took a while for me to pull myself together, with a lot of help from good medical professionals, some special friends, & a couple of awesome family members.

Honestly, don't be scared to go 'shopping' for a good doctor for you!
HONESTLY, you're not crazy or a loon!
go to church. don't know one then drive around and look for any reputable looking one.
You know something? you get some of the best advice and direction; car and respect in church and it's all FREE



I know , I was in one hell of a rut.
I think you are depressed and need help.
your Doctor should have spotted this if your are "breaking down" when you see him/her.
ask to see another Doctor .maybe you would feel more comfortable with a female doc.
they won`t think your a loon" but they will give you the help you need.
I am a fellow suffer with many of the same problems and have been for sometime so I do know what your going through.
your daughter needs her mom so PLEASE talk to someone ASAP.
maybe a good friend would be willing to help?
A call to the Samaritans may help because the service is completely confidential (you dont have to be suicidal for these (excellent) people to listen)
Hope everything works out for you xxx
From what i understand, you need help quickly. i went through this phase years ago when it seemed there was nothing to live for. I felt like this for 7 - 8 years which I overcame by setting challenges for myself, by making people around me happy and laugh and by making new friends. You need to get on with your parents as they are key to your happiness - start by finding any common ground and work on that. They can help you - if you dont get on with your parents, will your two year old get on with you?

Look in the mirror - you have so much to live for. Go and get some help if you need it - not necesaarily the doctors. Go and see a shrink. Maybe expensive but in a couple of years - when you are laughing so much youll think money well worth it. Thatas what i am doing now
ok.. first of all take a nice deep breath. relax, it sounds like your just unhappy with your life at the moment and there are lots of simple things to do make it 100 times better!
now im not going to try tell you what to do but ill give you an example of what i did,
i was in the same situation,
1stly i sold my house, it wasnt worth all the pressure i was under, we bought a smaller house a bit further out of town instead, then i quit my job, i was working as an accounts manager and had only meant to work there a few months while i figured out what i wanted to do with my life, i ended up working there 3 yrs, i figured out what i wanted to do and got a job doing that, i also joined a gym so i was healthier, happier from excercising and meeting new people, its hard when your an adult.
i had been unhappy in my relationship before, partly i was jealous because he had everything he wanted, he loved his job etc. when i got my new job and was going out more things where a lot better, i was content inmyself and more independant.

i hope this has helped you, people use the term depressed way to much, al it is is an excuse to feel sorry for yourself and not do anything about it, just decide what you want and go for it, it may look hard before you start, but i promise its not and its worth it in the end!
You're not just depressed, you're clinically depressed, and your doctor should be taking more notice of you. Severe post-natal depression can last for years, unfortunately, especially when there are other factors in your life to complicate matters, such as those you mentioned.

One question though, do your parents love your daughter? If so, can't you use your daughter as a way of rebuilding your relationship with them? It sounds like you need their support, but don't know how to ask them. Give it a try.
I once had the same symptons, but without the debt, the daughter and the annoying partner, and thought I was depressed, but it just turned out I was manically unhappy. SLIGHT difference.

So you hate your life: change it.
Tell your partner how you feel. Get him to take a week off work so you can both have a bonding session with your daughter. If you find you can't be genuinely happy, then yes, you're probably depressed. But if you get to be quite happy, make some changes. By the way, if your daughter is reaching the age of two, well, it's called the terrible two's for a reason. It's just a stage. Partner annoys you? I think they annoy everyone to be honest.

Don't like your reflection? Get a haircut. Don't like your name? Change it. Think your doctor won't want to see you cry? Well look at it this way, who are they going to tell? Patient doctor confidentiality, you learn to love it. And if you really are depressed, the only way you're going to get prozac is by telling them the truth.

As for your money problems, by the time I've finished uni, I'm going to be at the very least, £21,000 in debt. But you know what? I couldn't give a stuff. It's just money after all. Bits of paper, scraps of metal and numbers printed or scratched all over them. Money is money is money. It's not important. Just keep trundling along, get as many application forms as possible for various jobs, even if they sound menial and pathetic. I find that having a small job, even if it's pathetic, is better than having no job at all, because at least you are getting some sort of money in.

And no one's going to lock you away. My ex-bestfriend had voices in her head, she still does, but you know what? She's allowed to wonder among the living, no one locked her away and no one ever will. Depression isn't quite sane mindedness, but it doesn't mean you belong in an asylum. Some very lucky people with depression can actually understand things more clearly with their condition. Another old friend of mine was like this. He did some strange things but later on we found out that he was always right to do so.

So to summarise. if you're unhappy, do something about it, if you're depressed, see a doctor, and be honest.
Yes, you sound depressed. If you have trouble talking at the doctor's office, and I totally understand the breaking down & crying part and not being able to talk, then write things down! Do not be afraid to write things down and hand it to the doctor when you get there. Of course, don't write a book. Keep each thing brief. I have done this many times. You sound just like me when I'm not on medications.
I'm sorry you are feeling the way you are. I hope you get the help you need soon. If you do not have an appointment scheduled with a doctor soon please make one as soon as possible.
you must be depressed to say you wished you'd never had your daughter you need to see your GP and tell them everything your not a loon your depressed its an illness
Firstly dont be scared that they will lock u up .. you will only be sectioned under the mental health act if u are a threat to ur own or someone elses life .
It does sound like u are depressed .. the doctor is there to help even if it takes and hr of their time ..sit and talk to them , tell them every thing .
If ur debts are that bad contact the Citizens Advice , they can give u impartial advice .. You could go bankrupt , a friend of mine did she owed nearly 20 grand, yes she had to go to court and state why she was in this mess , but believe me she is happier for it . i think it cost about £400 to go bankrupt . She was discharged from bankruptcy after 12 months .. her life is so much easier ( although if u own a property i would think wisely b4 doing it )
You have problems with ur self esteem due to ur depression , once the doctor has recognised they will either get u to c a councillor or prescribe drugs .. and the drugs do work .. i know because i am also on them , yes it will take about a month . but u will see the light at the end of the tunnel
It is common that we want to push away the people most close to us at a time when we are feeling low .. but in time u will feel differently
i hope this helps :o)
you not only sound depressed but desperate for help. you don't hate your daughter you just have so much going wrong at the moment that you can't stand anyone making anymore demands on you and sadly your daughter comes into that category.
try writing down EVERYTHING that's going wrong in your life, write how you feel and then try going back to the doctor, don't try i explain how you feel just hand over the letter, this way he/she can see what stress you are under and help you the best they can.
if you can fight the depression then you will be strong enough to deal with your other problems and also start to enjoy your life and your daughter again,once the pressure that you are under begins to lift you might even start to like your partner again,
believe me i know what it feels like, best of luck !
Go back to Doctors and have a good cry and get it all out in the open. You are definately depressed and you can get help for it. I was given medication because everything was getting on top of me - just like you -and they really do work. Taking something to help doesnt mean you are going to end up addicted. I'm now taking my little tablet every day and just getting on with it.
You know - when Im feeling really down I just think of those that are really in a true state at the moment. People suffering with terminal illnesses - in which I know of some. It makes you wake up a little and notice that lifes not so bad.
Remember, you can always declare yourself bankrupt and clear the debt issue....you can always move on without your partner as you obvioulsy don't love him that much anymore..you can always contact your parents and at least make some good with them even if you still cant stand them much. You can always move to a different area....some people offer great jobs accommodation and most importantly, dont ever hate looking in the mirror....You obviously have very low self esteem. Lock yourself in the bathroom and give yourself the best pampering session you can. I promise you will feel immediately better.
Whatever you choose to do......I think we all forget sometimes that it is 'we' who are in charge of our own destiny and if you really want something......go make it happen!
Good luck!
You are not wasting anyones time talkiing about your problems as people that cant listen maybe have more problems than you that make yours seem not all that bad ,Write down your problems the worst at the top off the list , then when you have done that work your way down and solve one problem at a time
Hello
I will suggest a complete change of your life and the way you look at things-did you ever think of spirtual causes of your "crisis"?- and tell you about a better alternatice of the doctor.
What about your relation with God? The first step to find yourself is to find your God and know Him the true knowledge.
Do you really know Him? Do you really love Him? Have you tried to ask him and tell Him everything in your head and let your tears down as you like? Remeber that Allah (God) is more merciful than your mother and father. He says in His book : "When My servants ask thee concerning Me, I am indeed close (to them); I listen to the prayer of every suppliant when he calleth on Me; let them also with a will listen to My call and believe in Me; that they may walk in the right way." Quran 2-186
If you really would like to have a fresh start, give your soul a chance to breathe ! To breathe the truth.
If you want to have peace in your mind, you have to be in peace with your God first. That is to respect Him, love Him, and adhere to His Instructions.
I invite you to learn about your Lord from an Islamic point of view. The view that repsects Jesus (peace be upon him), and glorifies God.
http://www.sultan.org
And here you can find the stories of many women who really found themselves in Islam:
http://thetruereligion.org/modules/xfsec.

May Allah bestow His Mercy upon you
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