anti d`s should i be on them again?
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I really feel for you and have been there in my own way. It's different for everyone of course.
Firstly I do think you should go back on your anti d's. If you want to come of them then you should do so but only with consultation and monitoring with you GP and therapist. It is very unwise to just stop taking them and this can just leave you back at square one. Going cold turkey can be a big shock to the system also and it is often better to come of them as part of a gradual process. It's no good taking away the crutch when you still have a broken leg.
With regard to your family. It just sounds like you are too nice about things. Stop saying 'please help me' and start saying 'This gets done before any fun time'
Four kids can be tough and I know that feeling of you may as well do it yourself or it will never get done.
I suggest you decide which chores you want your children to do and then sit down with them. Get their input and make a rota with a reward system. I know initially it will feel like banging your head against a brick wall but honestly if you can make it through the initial storm it will be so worth it in the long run.
Approaching it with chores you want the children to do and then saying 'Right, I have decided I want these things done between you, how would you like it split' will mean that they are involved in the decision making and might prevent them arguing with you. Have a time table ready for them to complete and work with them to make sure it is fair. You can even make it a condition on them getting pocket money with a penalty for things they don't do.
But you have to stick with it and be tough! And I know how hard it is to be tough when you feel the way you do. You also need your husband to back you up on this so discuss it with him before approaching the children.
I think it is really important for you to make some time for you. Where it is just you (and a friend if you wish)... A couple of hours where you can read a book, walk in the park, window shop or whatever it is you need to feel like you and not a mother/wife. We often lose our identity within a family and you need to reclaim that. Maybe in the future do a course in something YOU have always wanted to do. Disover what makes you the person you are rather than being defined by those you love.
Your husband is another issue. It sounds like you have taken a lot but I do understand your reasons. Talk to him. Tell him you need more support and tell him what that support initials. Maybe make a chores table for him too. Or give him like 5 things he has to do during the week to help you. Cook once a week, put his clothes in the laundry basket, take out trash as and when required, look after kids for your me time or whatever it is you need.
There are no overnight results but if you take baby steps now one day you will feel a bit better and eventually look back on this time and really see the difference.
I don't know if I have helped but I hope you get something from this. Sorry it was so long. If you ever want to just chat to someone anonymously who has been in depression please feel free to email me or add me to yahoo messenger.
Good luck and take care of you. You aren't any good to anyone if you aren't ok!
Sounds like it
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