Where does someone go for help when they are surrounded with depressed people?
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Answers:
Karen, you are in a pretty tough and exhausting situation. I had written more and lost it all when I hit search the web.
The National Depressive and Manic Depressive Association (NDMDA) has chapters all over the US. They offer meetings for people with manic depression, and support for family. They have reading material free or to order that may help. Depending on the severity of your husband's condition you may feel totally overwhelmed by him alone.
Does either he or your daughter go to therapy or counselling? If so, take advantage that counsellors like to have family sessions also. It can be there to make your needs known and get suggestions for what you can do for your own counselling if that is what you seek.
Your husband's or daughters physician should be able to lead you in the right direction also.
These professionals do not expect you to be 'the rock' that your family may expect from you. Any one of them can easily flare up and lash out at you, hurt you with their words, and all the time your efforts are mistaken for whatever their minds lead them to believe, despite the truth. It takes courage and patience to step back and remove yourself mentally from them. You are not abandoning them if you do. You are keeping yourself in balance with reality (that they may not see). By the same token, weary of the needs of three loved ones with their psychological issues, you may take personally anything that comes out of their mouths. Don't. Refrain from lashing out, from personalizing or taking ownership of thier uncomfortable remarks. You can expect blame for instance, but dont try to justify yourself if any one of them is not mentally healthy enough to actually "hear" you.
One of the best things you can do is develop a support system for yourself. People you know you can trust, that you can call who will listen and help if you ask. That goes back to being 'the rock', you cant be and shouldnt burden yourself. Reaching out to others, as you did here, can be one of the most important, readily available forms of help for you. Discuss your needs with your friends, family and any professionals that you can call. Keep these names and numbers with you.
I believe the NDMDA is located in Chicago if you cannot find it in the toll free directory # 1-800-555-1212. In Chicago, it will have a 1-312-number.
The National 9 line is able to provide some limited crisis intervention by phone but can perhaps get you going in the right direction by finding places local to you. That # is 1-800-999-9999
No one, not even a professional, knows what it is to live under the same roof with someone with manic depression, nor someone with depression such as your daughter is recovering from, unless they have.
No one but someone with manic depression or depression knows what it is to live life with the disease. Its difficult for all at the very least.
Better days are ahead for all. When? who knows for sure, but keep the faith. It may still be a strain for quite awhile but you love these people and they love you. That is the foundation to build on and remind yourself of. But.you're one person. not a rock.
Prayers for all of you.
Other Answers:
You should speak to a therapist for yourself; I hope the other members of your family are recieving some kind of treatment as well.
Hi Karen,
The best thing to do would be talk to a mental health professional.
I hope everyone is feeling better soon.
GL & TC
Lucy
It could be that the depression has its roots in low blood sugar - something that happens to everybody every day, but for some it can hang around. If you are in charge of the food creation, you have a sneaky way to keep yourself balanced, and maybe help them too, without their being aware of it.
For basic information on hypoglycemia (low blood sugar), check out www.hufa.org. For information on its precursor condition – hyperinsulinemia – check out www.mayoclinic.com/health/hype.
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