help me please! i have a problem and my therapist isn't helping!?
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Answers:
Perhaps try a differnt therapist. Your first step is done. You know that you need help. You have admitted that you cut yourself and you want to stop. A therapist can not instantly make you stop. They are there to guide you into helping yourself.
The only thing I can think of that you might want to try is a behavioral change. When you get that urge to cut yourself you need to find something differnt to do. Perhaps a small ball that you can sqweeze. sorry my spelling is not the greatest.
I used to work in a group home and this girl was a picker. She would pick until she bleed and sometimes even down to the bone. The ball thing seems to help her. Atleast it did when I was there.
Do you like to write. I know I like to write poems when I am feeling peed off at the world. It's a good stress relief. If your not into poem perhaps a journal.
If your not comfortable with that then perhaps going for a jog.
I wish I had the answers for you.
Cognitive is the way we think. You will need to try to think in a differnt way.
example: sometimes I think my friends are talking about me behind my back. I believe this because they have talked about others behind their backs. So to me it makes sense that they are doing it to me too. When I start thinking this way if I don't get control of my thought I lose it. It's not always easy to change my thought process. I try to remind myself that chances are they are not talking about me and if they are why do I care so much. Then I decide I am better than that and really don't need to care what they think of me. Sounds kinda of silly but I trick my mind into believing whats the big deal.
Behavior changes are hard but possible. I am self distructive just in a differnt way. I smoke cigs. I do it when I am depressed, upset bored even though i know it's bad for me I continue to do it. I haven't changed that behavior yet. Mainly cuz i am not sure how to and a little scared I am not strong enough.
I did stop my behavior of drinking. I drank to drown my sorrows. It wasn't easy and it took a long time but I did it.
Well I hope this helps or atleast gives you some ideas of your own on what to do.
Good luck to you and I hope you start to feeling better.
Other Answers:
Get yourself a good medical doctor. Ask them for anti depressants and for programs that can help you.
well what i would do is go to a different therapist
if your therapist isnt helping tell your mom about it so she can help you stop doing it
First realize that your therapist is only trying to help. Therapy is really the best way to go--they are professional and can help way more than us on youqa.com! Try seeing a different therapist or psychologist.
We all know cutting is bad, but I understand why you might want to. Just remember that it gets you nowhere--even if you think it is helping.
If you ever need to talk, there are tons of people you can email on Yahoo, including me! I always am up for a late night email or whatever you need.
Best regards,
Annie
you should go out and chill out with your friends often, maybe you are being too lonely for long time that's way you are in so much stress...just have some fun and try to be happy, hope you feel better
The first thing I would recommend is that you go to a hospital for admission and treatment of any physical injuries that you may have where they can also have you admitted to a psychiatric ward to promote stabilization of your condition. The next thing I suggest that you do is find another therapist ASAP! If your current therapist is not helping you then you want to change the avenue in which you are getting treatment. If there is a mental health center in your city then I suggest that you also consider contacting them so that you may be seen by their therapeutic staff and some immediate decisions can be made on how to best help you.
Listen just step back..take a good look at yourself you are beautiful and you have alot to offer just believe that...try to understand what is making you feel so worthless and eliminate it...man this question scares me..i feel really sad for you just know someone out there is thinking about you and really praying for you to find some happiness and self worth SMILE you are worth it
Go to a therapist who specializes in self-injury. Therapy can take years.
You should see a therapist that specializes in this area. So many simply don't know how to deal with it. Also, many (if not all) Rehabs now have resources and programs for cutters.
http://www.focusas.com/SelfInjury.html
First get another therapist. One that listens and will take what you are going through seriously. Because cutting is a serious mental cry of despair.
And, Two - you are not worthless just scared.Go through your personal history and find out what got you to this point in your life and see if you can face it. So when you find a new therapist you will be able to talk to them and get the help that you need.
Good luck
they have something new called nero feedback,ask your therapist sbout it
ok. first meds alone won't stop you from cutting...neither will just plain therapy alone. Try to find a group called DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy) in your area... ask your therapist about it. It is skills coaching...you get to learn new responses to old behavior...it really helps a lot of people!! It teaches distraction techniques - so you can stop yourself from hurting yourself. Teaches about all the different emotions...it is interesting how many cutters mislabel their emotions. And also covers how to interact with people (get what you need in a healthy way).
I hope you will be able to find a group in your area.
You sound like you are pretty overwhelmed. For one thing, the therapist has to go. I had a bad one for years that misdiagnosed me and believed guilt-tripping was the best medicine. When i switched finally it was such a revelation--that someone could actually care about what i thought and could somehow manage or deal with my crazy emotions. There are therapists that specialize or have more experience in self-injury. That can be good because it is really such a misunderstood thing. When i showed up with scars and my parents relayed what i was doing, they labeled me with Borderline Personality Disorder and then told me i was trying to manipulate people when really it was my only and last method of expression. Switching therapists may seem like a lot of work or might be unappealing cuz its new but its really worth it. shrinks and such are already in your head. if they go in there and mess around badly you'll be much worse off.
Your dad shouldn't be telling you he hates you. Maybe this is one of the underlying problems why you're so sad? Life and emotions can be overwhelming enough without your family not supporting you. If you're in abusive situations, this is really something you should discuss with somebody, especially your therapist. if you don't feel that you can discuss this with him/her, this is another serious reason why you should get somebody else. Discuss it because you should think about why your dad is making you feel bad, and through this learn that it is not something you should be blaming yourself for. You might be able to find ways of communicating with him as well (you do deserve to have your feelings heard, no matter what anybody says). Its also really nice to tell someone how somebody else is making you feel and have them accept that and validate your feelings.
Cutting I find is often done when you aren't allowed to express yourself entirely. it can be like some kind of revolution against silence for yourself but it still doesn't tell anyone or fix the problem or allow you to really express what's happening.
I stopped cutting about 2 years ago. When i did i made a list of things i could do that would satisfy me momentarily instead. i did stuff like take a red pen and draw all over myself, because it kind of looks like blood and you still can feel like you're slashing. I also wrote poetry or in my journal about how i was feeling. screaming is also really fun if not a bit foolish. or write a bunch of crazy stuff onto a piece of paper and then tear it up (if you feel violent).
But stopping really requires support in other areas of your life too. Cutting is a relief from intense pain or emptiness or depression. If you try to take it away without increasing emotional support in other areas or without learning new coping skills, you won't have your relief and its not really going to seem doable.
You deserve happiness and selfworth can find this with enough perserverence. trust me, i have (and i didn't think it was remotely possible). I really wish you comfort and safety.
get a cure form Alfons Ven. It is such an awesome help.
You take a few milksugarballs everyday and start cleaning up.
I was so amazed taking this cure. It helped me out so much.
Milksugarballs to support you in what you need help with.
You can combine this with normal medication
This is very sophisticated stuff If you beleive in it awesome things will come your way.
Love Frans
maybe you should go for a second opinion if you are not comforable with your therapist. ithe mental health resource center
can suggest many avenues for you to go, if you are cutting again
you need to get to the nearest clinic to get some help. it sounds like you are very overwhelmed but whatever you do get yourself checked in and get some help. take care and good luck!
Yours is a very serious situation. If you aren't satisified with your therapist find a different one. That's one thing. You need to have one who you feel is helpful. Your therapist will understand.
Having said that, I do hope you'll remember that sometimes a person feels horrible and feels like he/she has "issues" when - really - its a person or people around them who makes them feel that bad. In other words, maybe you need a reminder that if someone around you is doing something crummy or saying something rotten to you they are the one with the problem and the one who is contributing to your problem. This doesn't mean you don't need a therapist, but maybe just remembering that someone or something outside of you is making you feel worthless and scared will at least help you see that you are not necessarily the problem but that you are reacting to a problem. Please remember, too, that sometimes people say things that they don't mean or that they don't know are hurtful.
Please start by being honest with the therapist you have now and asking him/her to refer you to someone new or else talk to a school counselor or even just a teacher at school.
When I saw your question I thought how I am not qualified to offer an opinion to you and how maybe it would make it worse for you if I said something that wasn't the right thing. Maybe people on here can share some different perspectives or thoughts, but please - you do need to find someone in your area who knows exactly what it will take to help you feel better.
Stop feeling sorry for yourself and get a grip on reality. Life is so short and your wasting time with stupidity.
Friend, you don't really need any medicines or therapy. You need some true care and true love, perhaps. But coming to your problem, I strongly suggest you the method I am going to tell you here. Just SINCERELY & REGULARLY do this:
>>> Choose your time when yuo can spare for 5 or 10 minutes.
>>> When you have decided upon your time then choose a peaceful place like your room, garden or any place where you don't find any disturbance.
>>> Now, close your eyes and say this to yourself without uttering a word:
"Today, I will look cheerful and no sign of anxiety, depression, sadness, or gloominess will be seen or felt by anbody on my face and I won't let anything or anybody bother me. I will be peaceful within. Everything small or big has its own value and importance in the nature and I am also worthy of anything. There's nothing to fear about and I won't hurt myself any more. Now I have resolved not to live like that I have always lived and will live like what I used to dream. I am free from all my mental stress and problems. I will live happily today and will make other laugh or smile. I will find joy in everything I come across today."
Friend, you can use your own words something like the ones I have given here. Repeate them for some 5 or 10 minutes regularly and sincerely.
I GUARANTEE THAT YOU WILL SEE THE EFFECT IN JUST 1 WEEK AND IF NOT THEN YOU ARE FREE TO WASTE YOUR MONEY ON MEDICINES AND DOCTORS' FEES & IF DOCTOROS COULD CURE YOU FOR YOUR ANXIETY THEN THEY WOULD HAVE A GREAT ANXIETY OF NOT HAVING PATIENTS!
And PLEASE don't harm yourself. :)
Wish you all the best! :)
Gopal.
Been right in your shoes sweetheart!, i started cutting myself at the age of 9, i had a lot of self hatered, i started cutting because the pain of that sort of justified the pain i was having inside and i wanted to try and let people see how much i was hurting on the inside by showing it on the outside, its really hard to explain but you know what i mean..... i went to see doctors too, but they just made me talk about how i was feeling and that made the situation worse! you say your dad hates you, if he really is saying this to you every day then you will never get better hunny, you need to remove yourself from the situation, if you are too young to go out there on your own with the help off the government, you will be helped by other orginisations ie Childline, you are not a person to be hated you are a strong, willfull person who is entitled to happiness! if there is no-one in your family to turn to then bugger it hunny, get out there and do it on your own! cause you know why?? YOU CAN! with empowerment and acheivment comes self worth and love, you will stop the cutting because you will no longer have pain inside that you want to show on the outside. GOOD LUCK HUNNY YOU ARE WORTH CARING FOR.
I have been cutting for since I was 11 years. I know what you are going through. My therapist doesn't seem to help. And honestly, anti-depressants don't help either. I would suggest maybe a 30 day treatment program for your self injury. I am 17, and have tried to committ suicide 23 times in since I was 14, anti depressants just make you worse...
Look around for another doctor, who you're seeing just isin't right for you then. Also depending on your age if you're on the wrong antidepressant for you're body type, it can make things ALOT worse. Keep looking for new therapists till you find someone who helps. Just don't give up, there's alot of people out there that can help, you've just not found the right one yet.
Well i think that your problem is far beyond the halp of meds and doctors. What you need to say is "why am I doing this to myself." If you already know I doubt it is a big enough reason to cut yourself, because instead of making the people that said mean things to you feel bad you are just making yourself fell even worse which in turn is empowering the others.
Can you move away from your dad? he's not making this easy for you. You are not worthless. You are special. find another therapist if you can. Get help...move away from the negative. May God bless you. You are in my prayers.
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