How do start to fix your LOW self-esteem?
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I have been, am on, the road you are on. The toughest hurdle for me to overcome, and the key for me to start on the road to recovery, was to finally accept that I was suffering from a brain disease - a chemical imbalance that was disrupting the chemical/electrical transfer of information thru my brain. It wasn't that I was just being a "Baby", or "Lazy" or a "wuss", Or that I should be able on my own to just "Suck it up" or "Cowboy Up" , or "Shake it off", and "get past it" - there's nothing wrong with me - "I'm just in a funk". But I could'nt just shake it off, and my self-esteem fell below sea level, I couldn't leave the house, I lost interest in every thing, the bed became my "drug", I slept for 18 - 20 hours a day.
Obviously I wasn't going to work, luckily they said I could have a medical leave, while I dealt with this problem. Finally I went to a Psychiatrist, I had made my mind up before I went in that I wasn't going to lie on a couch, look at any of those Roarsch Test Cards - you know the blabk splotches on the white cards that you are supposed to "see" images in - like - that's a man holding a baby, - that's a butterfly, - that one is a jumping horse. I was'nt going to listen to any crap about how I hated my Dad and wanted to have sex with my Mom.
I was supprised when I entered his officer - no couch, no cards, no questions about family, - just conversation about how I was feeling, any reasons That I could think of that might be contributing to how I was feeling - just "common sense" stuff. He explained about how the electrical synapses in the brain carry information between nerves as electrical charges arcing between nerve ends, and how a chemical imbalance in the brain can cause the synapses to "misfire" and the information transfer gets interupted, resulting in clinical depression for one thing, and also a host of other problems - depending on the number of synapses affected, and the amount of information disrupted, and the areas of the brain affected. More severe cases could cause autism, ADD, Bi-Polar, and a host of other brain disorders. Some of these brain diseases/disorders can be succesfully treated by ace inhibitors - drugs like Topomax, Zoloft, Relafen, Wellbutrin, Ritalin - etc.
So I suggest that if the anti-depressants you are on aren't helping you to feel "almost normal - to - normal" that you talk to your Doctor about changing dosage, or drugs or going to a psychotrophic drug "cocktail", (which I am on - Topomax & Wellbutrin), which - for me), works great.
Once i got my meds right, then I started working on self-esteem and self confidence. I got a daily diary, Then I vowed to stay awake at least 8 - 10 hours a day. Then I pledged to myself that I would do 1 chore, (set one goal) an hour, or a total of 8 - 10- chores or "goals" each day.
For the first two weeks the chores could be all indoors.
For the next two weeks, 1/2 of the chores or Goals must be done out doors - or indoors - but away from home.
For the next month, I needed to accomplish 10 separate chores or goals out of the house every day, Half in the moning and half in the afternoon. Additionally I had to do three activities at home that took a minimum of 3/4 hour each- but could be longer.
The following month, I planned on returning to work full time. I had been setting goals and achieving them. On weekends, when I achieved all my goals sucessfully for the week, I "treated myself" to a movie and a meal "out" - this "treat" was also a test - pushing the envelope - by forcing myself to socialize more and stay out in public more.
So what does that have to do with self esteem? Well everytime i set a goal/chore and accomplished it - that was a boost to my self esteem - it was an accomplishment - a small victory - and I was having 8 - 10 victories a day - thats 50 victories accomplished a week - which I think is a success in any bodys book - which should be a boost to anyone's ego/self esteem. Good Luck Bud! I'm pulling for you.
The glass is half full not half empty.
get off the drugs your docotor is giving you, cut sugar out of your diet and start an exercise program
Just tell yourself: "OK, I've hit bottom. Now, I'm going to look to the future. Tomorrow is full of promise for me. All I have to do is grab every opportunity available to progress." Do something every day to make yourself feel good about yourself - you can do it if you really try.
Just what youre doing is a start. Why is it so low in the first place? That's also a good start alone. Wake up every day, go to the mirror and say positive things to yourself.
Believe me, this works even if you think it sounds stupid.
"I look good today". "I can do anything". "I am a great mother." Say it with feeling. You may not believe it at first...but just wait. It will be like a light bulb going off...then, you'll begin to be just what your saying to yourself...POSITIVITY...
Just try it...it takes 30 days to make or break a habit...Get this good one goin.
1. You need to look at the reason(s) why you have low self-esteem (is it your looks, inability to accomplish goals, dissappointments from expectations).
2. Surround yourself with positive, understanding friends (who not only listen to you but go the extra mile to actually help you feel better about yourself).
3. Pray. ("My heart is heavy Lord, my burden is too hard to bear, take my cross for a little while and tell me that you care.)
Good luck to you.
Hi there twinvet,
Sorry to hear about you're struggles. I'm sure I don't know half the story right? Anyway, I do agree investing in yourself should always be your number one priority, so don't feel guilty over the kids or you're past, if you can? I'm sure you're a good woman and a trying mother so there.
Anyway, most women who have low self-esteem do so as a result of some issues in their past. If this is you're case please see a female psychiatrist/psychologist/ther... group you can share with and deal with you're emotional issues. Or talk with a minister of religion, preferably a female who is not a practising homosexual. Despite what anybody says, the Jesus in the Bible contradicts being a minister of religion or a practising christian with formal responsibility for helping people in areas you are weak in yourself. Jesus said, "the blind cannot lead the blind or they both will fall into a pit".
This choice is yours.
Anyway, we've digressed. If you've low self-esteem as a result of a poor body image, again you can learn to love yourself and you're body much more than you do now. Again you may need to work through some issues. The good thing as you may know, self-esteem can rapidly increase. Please find a good therapist, check their credentials carefully. One who comes highly recommended is always a good place to start.
Love and best wishes.
Barry H
Remember God loves you and so do Lots of other people. Fooled you huh ?
1) Find a good support group and talk to them. 2) Everytime you walk past a mirror, stop, look into the mirror, and say one positive thing about yourself. 3) Medication can help, so continue on medication as prescribed by your doctor. 4) Keep thoughts simple, like "one day at a time". 5) read about self esteem on the internet and possibly check out books on it (borders book stores usually have an excellent self-help section.
Don’t deprive yourself of your self-worth!!
You are not alone in this world..
Don't deprive yourself of your self-worth!!
You only need a HELPING HAND,
just like anyone else out who does at any point of their lives!!
Check out the way you can get your self esteem back over the weekend
http://hubpages.com/hub/selfesteemworkbo...
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