Have you had to come to terms with the suicide of someone close?
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Several friends and one relative took their own life, they were all mentally unwell and v unstable at the time. There was no question of forgiving them - they were all very very unwell at the time and if they had been in their right minds would not have ended it. I am in no way advocating suicide and it has taken me years to get over the loss but I am just saying personally I can understand why.
Unfortunately I have. Right after I graduated high school my best friend commit suicide. To make matters worse, I helped him pick out the gun he used to do it with. I used to love hunting when I was younger. Stephen asked me to give him a hand picking out a really good deer rifle. We went to the gun shop and he picked out a nice .308 winchester rifle which he killed himself with a month later. That was 15 years ago, and yes I do feel guilty.
I feel more angry with him though. First off, for putting me in that position. If he were going to do that he shouldn't have brought someone else into it. Secondly for doing it to begin with. In my oppinion, commiting suicide is the most selfish act anyone can do. They are only thinking of themselves and not about the people that care about them.
my cousin commited suicide a few years ago and ive never forgiven him for it. It may seem that I am not taking how he must of been feeling into account but there is always an alternative way of dealing with things other than taking your own life. Ive not come to terms with the emotions as its very hard when i see his family and they are reminded of their son by me.
I wrote a poem about it, that helped quite a bit... Yes, I forgive her, yes, I feel guilt that I couldn't save her... but that's reduced a bit over time... distance does wonders! You just have to deal with the emotions though, it's shocking and depressing, but I doubt there are any short cuts around it that are worth taking.
She's still on my mind, but I am a bit more objective now. I can smile at her memory.
it's very sad. of course it's a reason why they must have done it. when people near me do suicide, or just people in hawaii, i wonder what could anyone have done to prevent this from happening. it shows that the family was not there for them or their friends.
My best friend took his life, although I think he made a bad jugement, I have no reason to be angry at him, he was the one that made the decision. I feel guilt everday because I almost feel like I gave him the idea, but although I gave him the Idea I wasn't the one to put the nuse around his head.
It took a very very long time but YES I have come to terms with my mum committing suicide, what helped me was to ask myself why she did it and to try to put myself in her position at the time she took an overdose of tablets. I have forgiven her but I still do wonder if there was anything I could have done to change what happened I now accept this and take the view that with hindsight all of us would change some of our actions in the past.
don't despair it does get easier with time and I don't mean that as denying what you are probably feeling at present XXX
Yes. On the 12th of July 2000, I held my friends hand as all the lines on the hospital machine went flat, one after the other. He was only in his 30's. I was out that night, he might have called, wanting somebody to talk to, I only live about 100 yards from where he lived. I cried for three days. His mother was torn apart, I did all I could. He was bipolar, saved up all his spare medication over many years and just took the lot. I wish I'd been in. I can see his face now, I can hear his voice; he was a good friend. About twice a month he'd come round to my place, or I'd go round to his, he'd beat me at chess, we'd get drunk, tear the news apart, smoke his roll-ups. I wish I'd been in; he might have called wanting help. I have that to live with for the rest of my life.
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