How can i get my low self-esteem up and not be so worried about my looks?
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You need to take the focus off yourself.
If all you think of is what you look like, you will find every little thing wrong, measuring yourself against everyone you meet.
If you think about what you LIKE to DO, like sing, or draw or dance, or learn sign language, play volleyball--anything you like to do, and get really into it and learn all you can. Teach others.
Learn that you don't have to LOOK like anything to contribute to the welfare of the world. If you do, then that's ok, but LOOKS do not DEFINE WHO YOU ARE! YOU, INSIDE, the YOU in there, that is who you are!
Look at all you meet with eyes of love and compassion, instead of comparing and jealous, and envy, and then you will feel more at peace with yourself.
Chances are really good that you are way cuter than you think you are anyway. Low sel-esteem often doesn't have anything to do with looks. It has todo with feeling important, like you MATTER! Like someone respects you, and needs your input. You can get that no matter what you look like.
My favorite example of that is Eleanor Roosevelt, the First Lady to FDR. She was awful to look at, fat, and very goofy looking. But, her heart and wisdom were huge. She was well-respected and loved by millions of people.
BUT, even beautiful women can have low eself-esteem because they think people only want them FOR their looks and not what is INSIDE! Honest! and it is OFTEN TRUE! That is the saddest part of all.
It helps me a lot, to make a list every night of what I am most grateful for, even if it is that I am NOT sick. or Have $3 in my checking account. Anything. It makes me thankful for what I DO HAVE, and forget what I don't.
Good luck.
Find something you genuinely care about. Get busy and work hard at it. Get really involved with other people doing this great thing.
You won't have the time or energy to sit infront of a mirror and sigh.
Just keep in mind that looks are not what makes a person. Don't worry what other people think of you.
Do something that involves all of your focus so you can just forget about it.
Wear clothing that suits YOUR body. You'd be surprised at how many people think that they're fat simply because they're wearing unflattering clothes.
Spend more time with your friends, on your hobbies, and work hard in school. Hell, exercise if that would make you like your body better.
I used to be like that and then I just figured if people like me the way I am then I must be all right. Naturally, then I hit puberty and I got a good body that I honestly didn't care about because I was happy iwth myself. =D
Good luck!
you need to say man i look good
counsiller. helped me. also helps to have a supportive bf and family. everyones beautiful in there own way, you dont gota b famous or a model or in a magizine to be beautiful. think about it. everyone feels there not good looking, but after a good look in the mirror you see that your eyes are a special shade of green or that you smile lights up you face. remember, everyone has bad hair, bad body and bad face days. youll be ok! =) smile and itll b alright
I hate it that some people feel this way about themselves... The media has brainwashed women into thinking they have to look a certian way to be beautiful.
I consider myself to be a very honest person. If you want to email me a picture, or message me on myspace with a photo of yourself, I swear I'll tell you exactly what I think about you.
aqua_angel895@yahoo.com
www.myspace.com/chaotickimmy
Other than that, I'd say if you're just looking for an ego boost, go out for a day of pampering if you have the money. Or do it at home. Get a nice long bath, shave everything you like to have shaved (or go get it waxed), dye your hair and get it styled or cut, have your nails done or do them yourself, get a facial, put on the prettiest makeup you have, and take a picture of yourself afterwards, to remind you that you are beautiful. Personally, I do all of that at home twice a month (shaving more often). It always makes me feel better about myself.
Do things for yourself that make you feel better. For example, if your feeling overweight make sure your wearing clothes that not only flatter your body type, but make you feel comfortable. If it's really weight thats bothering you, start a plan to become healthier. That alone helps your self esteem. Also, do small things like get some great smelling lotion or try a new hair color. You'd be surprised at how small things can really make a difference in your self esteem. But most of all, tell yourself that no matter what you look like on the outside, you are a great person. Your looks can compliment that personality, but they should never come before it. :)
10 Steps to Improving Self-Esteem:
1. Build up your self-esteem. You must take an inventory. What do you want to improve or change about the way you interact with others? Try to make only one change at a time. Always check you progress before making another change.
2. Celebrate your journey, not your destination. Learn to always feel good about where you are now, and to exude self-confidence about anywhere you might find yourself tomorrow.
3. Set clear goals for yourself before every interaction. Know what you want. Think about how the people you will be meeting can help you reach those goals. Then decide how to approach each person accordingly. Apply this regularly and you will notice a difference.
4. Be proactive. Take the initiative. Be decisive. Let the other person know exactly how he or she can help you. Proactive people tent to be more successful in their career.
5. Treat each person you meet as if she or he is truly important. (You'll be amazed how this works.)
6. Give a firm handshake; look the other person straight in the eye. Practice both of these. Your handshake should be just right. Not too firm and not too loose. Train yourself to notice something you like or find attractive in the person.
7. Listen! Listen! Listen! Teach yourself to develop good listening skills. Learn a way to remember the other person's name. If in doubt simply ask for the name again 2 or 3 sentences into the conversation.
8. Visibly respond to the other person. Smile, nod agreement, and address him or her by name. Apply all you listening skills to visibly respond. The body language is the most important part of a conversation. Practice, practice, practice…
9. Pay more attention to the other person than to yourself. Are you responding to what may be going on in his or her life? Don't filter out bad news. Put yourself in the other person's shoes. Be caring.
10. Stay "in the moment." Don't mentally cut off the other person. Don't reload while he or she is speaking. What this means is that you need to focus on the other person 100% during a conversation. Anything less is considered rude.
the best way is to find someone who loves you.
It isn't easy to do, I know but once you do you'll know how wonderful you really are.
IMHO, women obsess way too much about their appearance.
I know, I know, you're going to blame it on us men, but I think that's a cop out.
try to be happy with who you ARE, not how you think you look and find that someone special.
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