How do you cope with stress?
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Answers:
1. Most states offer medical insurance either cheap or free for those who cannot afford it. Please go to your state social services office and apply for all services you are eligible for including medical coverage, financial aide, job training or education assistance, etc. It will help get you on your feet, get you a professional to help put things in perspective, and put you in control of your own life again. It will also give you some support to get over this rough time.
2. Once you have insurance, please find a professional to teach you life skills so that you can beat the depression, cope effectively and go on to succeedl in your life.
3. I was not raised with the skills I needed to get through life, but I did learn them and change the course my life was headed. You can too. See a therapist and learn the skills you need. Search the net and book stores for self-help.
4. You want to get away from all the disfunction and surround yourself with people who are successful in their personal and professional lives. Work on you first. Allow others to be in charge of their own problems.
5. How I handle stress is:
a. Recognize it and know it is human and okay to experience a broad range of unpleasant emotions.
b. Get hard, physical exercise to unload the stress rather than turn it inward.
c. I also took skills classes in self-esteem, self-defense, assertiveness training, stress managment,anger managment, etc. I went to school and got trained in a profession I love where I can help others and continue to learn and grow. I like being able to pay my own bills and have the choices I have.
d. Learned what makes me happy and made myself a priority in my own life. I set time aside to do things that make me enjoy living, and even more so when I am under increased stress and drama.
e9. Eat well with good nutrition on a consistent basis. If you have been emotionally or physical abused in your life, you don't learn to treat yourself with any respect. You need to. A counselor can help you gain insight, skills, and perspective to treat yourself well. I would take the time and see one.
f. Took up yoga to be in control of stress and tension
g. Get up, get out, and get busy
h. Control what I can, drop the things I cannot, and work on knowing the difference.
i. Go to a comedy club or rent something that will make me laugh.
There are many healthy ways to get through tough times. Respect yourself enough not to abuse yourself. Don't tolerate it from others and don't tolerate from you. No one deserves such treatment.
As you can more control over your life, start heading toward some good goals, and love yourself, the cutting and vomiting will be a long distant memory.
You have enough going on without being mean to yourself. You deserve tender, loving, kindness. Give it to yourself. Encourage yourself. Find out how to get where you want to go. You are in control of your life and what happens to you now. Take the steps you need to take to get it on the right track.
I am sorry things are tough right now. You can head toward better days. You did the right thing dropping the lying jerk. Good for you.
I wish you the best. I hope this helps.
How about a counselor at school? These folks are THERE to HELP you. I really encourage you to consider it. You might be surprised at just how helpful they can be.
Hang in there,
~M~
* RELAXATION TECHNIQUES
o Recognize what activities you consider relaxing.
o Be specific when exploring your options:
–going for walks
–meeting with friends
–reading for pleasure
–listening to music
–taking a bath
o Be realistic about the amount of time that you can dedicate to "downtime".
o This time should be incorporated into your daily routine.
o Remember this is called BALANCE- not be used as a procrastination tactic.
o Begin practicing relaxation techniques
–meditation
–guided imagery
–deep breathing exercises
–progressive relaxation (muscle relaxation)
o Decide which relaxation technique works for you and practice daily.
o Find several techniques that work for you so you have an array of options.
* STRESS MANAGEMENT TECHNIQUES
BODY:
o Along with improving your ability to relax, you must assess diet and other strains on your body.
o Aerobic exercise can reduce anxiety up to 50%.
o Good nutrition (a well balanced diet) will improve your ability to appropriately respond to stress.
o Get an adequate amount of rest each night.
o Reducing caffeine intake will help you manage your anxiety (2 ½ cups of coffee doubles the epinephrine level).
o Smoking cessation is important, as nicotine is also a stimulant.
o Biofeedback techniques can help up to 80% of migraine sufferers.
o Acupuncture has also shown promise.
MIND:
o If you have multiple stressors (deadlines, increased responsibilities), you must prioritize your time.
o Initiating a time management schedule remains a positive way to reduce stress and anxiety.
o Break large demands into small, manageable parts. Work through one task at a time.
o Do what needs to be done first, leaving other things for tomorrow.
o Identify your goals and work toward them.
o Take direct action when stress arises- identify your needs and articulate them; Be intentional about what you can do.
o Acknowledge your thoughts and feelings concerning the stressors in your life.
o Develop a support network to rely on in times of need.
o Remember to be kind to yourself and not dwell on the "shoulds
Personally, I deal with stress through psycho pharmacology. I have dealt with both issues (throwing up after eating and cutting). Of the two, I would suggest you stop cutting first. After losing many friends during an Iraq deployment, and returning to the states only to realize that I was an emotional zombie I started to cut. I didn't stop. For a long time. I was held in an Army mental ward, and now my left arm bears scars that will never heal fully, everywhere I go people look at me. Trust me, you do not want this.
The answer for me, was therapy and psycho pharmacology. While I realize that therapy may not be available to you, I strongly recommend you try and get on medicaid or something of that nature. At the very minimum, you need medicine to help you with your problems (at a very minimum an SSRI such as lexapro, prozac, zoloft, etc.). If it gets to the point where you feel suicidal, go to your local public hospital and tell them you need help. I'm not going to lie, this probably won't be the ultimate solution but HOPEFULLY you can get medicine at a minimum.
I would also recommend finding someone who you can be completely honest with and who will listen to your problems and give you constructive advice, and most of all be there for you.
Remember, above all that depression, anxiety, eating disorders, etc. are mental and can be defeated if you really want them to be. If things EVER get to hard to deal with, go to a hospital. Also, try not to drink any alcohol or use any drugs as they tend to alter your mental chemistry even further, making the problem worse.
To cope with day to day stress I blow bubbles. It sounds so simplistic. I bought a bottle of soap bubbles -- the kind you find in toy stores. What it does is distracts your mind, slows your breathing, and allows you to think more clearly.
For the long term stress that you're under, counseling is an excellent idea.
Good luck to you.
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