Would u mind if u have ...?
Question:
Tnx so much =)
Answers:
Hey Brooklyn
What an awesome question.
Now my answer may get lengthy because of Bipolars rapid thought always running thru my mind and I need to make sure I get them all out or they will race right by and I may miss something important.
Now being "wordy", which my goodness everyone who know me or has read any of my answers knows that my answers are long and it takes me forever to tell a story because I am unable to leave out even the smallest of details. I have tried and tried and tried and literally made myself nuts (no offense) because leaving out a detail even something as silly as "there also was this little tiny purple flower on the table, maybe it was a Johhny Jump Up, at least I think it was anyway". WHY CAN'T I JUST SAY PURPLE FLOWER??
It's simple: Because I can't, that is all...I can't. The reason is because I have OCD. This is just one example of my OCD symptoms.
And as I hear myself ramble on and on and on, I am aware of it, aware that the person I am speaking with is loosing interest fast and I haven't gotten to the point yet...I become embarrassed, ashamed, tourtured inside because I am so highly aware of my OCD traits that are so obvious and my Bipolar quirks and most of the time I am apologizing for any or all of my OCD issues and the same for my Bipolar quirks.
Ohh yes, I have worked on them in therapy and have made great strides. So if this is still quirky and long, imagine me without any improvements. It's a wonder anyone ever spoke to me before.
So I have Bipolar 1 with constant layers and layers of racing thoughts of all different subjects, reasons, I really don't know it is just a biproduct of Bipolar and I am so afraid I will be a thought that is important, I try to read my thoights as one of those long black signs that the words scroll past and if you miss the first few words, do you ever find yourself standing there until it repeats itself so then you have the full message and then can decide to throw the message away in the trash can in your brain or to keep it and file it away for future use. That is a portion on how my Bipolar brain is wired.
There are so many messages flashing on so many boards all at the same time and this happens 24/7 doing work, chores, parenting, conversing with others, it is always there. No wonder I go to make a statement and as soon as I open my mouth I forget it and must say "Ooops, wait a minute, it will come back" So I wait infront of that message board until the thought I am looking for comes back then so I don't forget it again, I have to blurt it out. That has got to be so annoying to others it makes me crazy as to try and feel what they feel when things are constantly blurted out.
Annoying, yes true, can I change that fact? No. I have to come to learn I have funky quirks and when someone accepts me, the must accept the whole me or dont accept me at all. The funky quirks are a part of me just as is my skin.
Combining these two examples and Lord knows I have many many many more, but combine these two examples some of the reactions I get are:
Hurry up, hurry up and finish already. OMG. Just finish.
People loose interest in what I have to say because there are so many words.
Of course it is good for those who want an indepth response to their part of the conversation, than I am relaxed and loose.
And so very many more.
Now keep in mind that this is really only one of my examples I have used to tell of my Bipolar and OCD relationships with each other.
It's not easy, Painfully aware, you know what you sound like and just cant stop, you know the person you are talking to has lost interest in talking to you because there is so many junk words in there that the point of the story is hard to be found. And obviously, I am worse on paper but also better at the same time because I can alsways go back and try to remove some useless sentence. Most of the time I cannot, but on the few times I can remove even 1 junk sentence, I become very proud and it is like I just took my first baby step!
Alright going to TRY to stop here, You all have a great day!
Be safe and be well
j xxx
****Just looked at it after posting my answer.
It's a flippin NOVEL
and I did try to be short. Sorry
Find a LOCAL support group.. to share your help, hope and experiences with or Also online there are support groups for OCD and Bi-polar....on the sites are all kinds of coping tools and shares of others with the same diagnosis.. Good luck
Lots and lots of medication
Good nights sleep
Exercise daily (walking)
Treat to eat right
and...remember to laugh everyday!
It is hard, but it can be done.
i do have both and it is all avout the meds and therapy it took a year to get my meds in otder some days you do not cope woyj anything i am also very manic i can sray up for days and days until i collapse somedays are all good take one day ay a time ok
Lets reverse this if you please, how many personalities do you have? I know at least three, being bi-polar is something totally different than this. I know!
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