How can I become more confident?
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take a notebook at the top of each page write one thing you want to achieve
then under this write small baby steps on how to achieve
now you have a plan
in another notebook write down all your strengths and everytime you do one of those baby steps write those down and when you are not feeling confident look at this notebook and see your successfullness
Lift weights.
i feel the same way.and ya like the guy above said.i lift now. i guess im feelin better
sounds gay but honestly it works.
stand in front of a mirror and comliment yourself when you wake up and go to bed.
if you get a compliment... even "youre a really good friend"
go to your mirror and believe it!!
good luck!
change up your hair color or get some new clothes if you think that will boost your confidence too. try to solve the things that are bothering youu!
write your imperfections on a paper on the other write what you would tell anoter to do to fix tat. ooor go get a nw look die your hair cut it die it or get extentions new make up or clothes
The best way is to look at something in your life, or about you/your personality etc... that you think is something worth praising or being confident over... concentrate on your strengths. Don't think that everyone is thinking negatively about you. The perfectionist part... if you want to tone it down, start with something small, that would bother you, but try and let it pass, keep letting small things pass you, and not worrying over perfecting them. Once you can let the small things not bother you, start allowing for bigger things, keeping yourself challenged... Good Luck
you want to hear my answer?
soak it up!
sounds unorthodox but it's the truth. Eat that perfectionist pride you built around yourself and take the risk of doing something with out fearing failure.
I had your problem (thanks to my dad).
gym and rock climbing helped (along with metal music which's violent lyrics help me spell some stuff out)
Wear red look at red. it is a confident color. Pray if you are a praying person. Surround yourself around people that you view as confident, take yourself out of your comfort zone and learn from others. Read books on better self esteem, articles whatever you get your hands on. Tell yourself you are confident every morning the more you hear it the more you believe it. Think as though you are and soon you will be. It is mind over matter.
love yourself. look in the mirror, really look, and think about what it is about you or your life that you don't like. then try and tell yourself why you don't like it and what you would do to fix it. after struggling to find the right words to justify your reasoning, you'll probably come to the same conclusion as everyone else: because of "them". them, of course, being the people that look at you and who you think is judging you.
I know this doesn't sound like advice but i'm getting to the point now. What doing all this makes you realize is that you are trying to live your life for everyone else and not for YOU. so stop trying to be perfect for them and start doing it for YOU. when you do that, you'll realize that there really isn't a single thing wrong with you.
Look in the mirror and love yourself for all the wonderful things about you. use that to get you through each day. when you focus on all the positive things about you and you keep that with you all the time, you will be more confident in yourself.
the problem is that people base their lives on societal norms and what is accepted by the majority which is why we often feel like things aren't they way WE want them to be.
so live for yourself, trust yourself, love yourself for YOU and no one else..then confidence will come easily and naturally.
you can't just become confident. it doesn't work like that. if its not who you are its not who you are. HOWEVER that being said people sometimes want to change-like everybody wants to change. the answer to confidence-don't second guess yourself. go with your first instinct and if its right (which it most likely is) then yay! if its not, you're gonna have like a million more chances what are you 15? you have you're whole life! just go with what you feel is right for YOU always. it will make you more confident and a stronger person. i think you'll find you'll like yourself better and who you've become. and it will help your life too. BE YOU. when someone second guesses themselves they aren't being them. they're being a "picky and deciding" them. don't do that! and have fun with things if you feel like you need to be perfect but its just not working out for you don't sweat it! what if your life ended tomorrow-would you want your last night being spent worrying over something trivial that doesn't matter? live for the moment, don't second guess yourself, and smile at yourself sweetie! if you don't like something about yourself that's not gonna change (unlike most things) accpet it and be happy! :-)
Read a self-help book. Don't be embarrassed by reading it. Lots of people do it. Both me and my brother went through a despression after our grandmother died and we lost all self-confidence. Reading the books are a TREMENDOUS help!! And if you don't already, try writing in a journal. And maybe try acting and dancing on stage! That boosts your confidence through the roof! :)
To start with, here's a general rule of life: focus on the good, not the bad. In your case, look more at the things you DO have some amount of control over, for example your own mind and the choices you make. Also, keep in mind that it's never possible to be in control of everything--that's what makes life fun!
If you're feeling a bit low on self confidence, don't worry! I've been there myself. I also have a tendency to want everything to just turn out perfectly, and get so depressed when I feel like I haven't lived life as flawlessly as I had planned. I've found that when I'm nervous about something, it helps to tell myself, "Just screw this up as badly as you can." It sounds ridiculous, I know, but it helps put things in perspective and, above all, it makes you laugh a bit. Plus, telling yourself that gives you permission to not have to be perfect, so that you can focus on enjoying yourself in a new situation instead of trying to seize control of it and force everything to turn out how you want. And I'm sure that if you're even asking this question, you know quite well that things NEVER end up how you thought they would.
Best wishes, and remember that you're not the only one struggling with this!
well, first, you have to improve your self-esteem and how you feel about yourself. you need to accept every part of yourself whether you like that part or not. if you want to and can change some part, do it, and your success will boost your confidence. but you need to realize no one is perfect too.
good luck!
I was in a similar situation once, I felt like I was making wrong choices left and right. What helped me was to always look ahead. You can't always be stuck living in the past, if you are a perfectionist you are doing a bad job, always look ahead never look back. We have all made mistakes before, you have to accept that you can not change who you are, you have to embrace your mistakes to make better choices.
First of all it's no one is perfect, don't waste your time trying.
Just do the very best when you do something. Write down the life it is you want, then make a list of goals to get there.
Confidence comes from believing in yourself, not relying on others to make you feel valid and worthwhile.
Try to new hobbies and you will find something you enjoy and it will bring out the positive side of you.
Get closer to God and you will see the goodness of the inner side to you, and you will shine with confidence.
Being a perfectionist may or may not have a lot to do with confidence. I think being a perfectionist has more to do with feeling in control, and that is an anxiety issue. Being confident means being able to be imperfect or perfect and not feeling threatened by either circumstance. To build confidence, I would suggest that you involved yourself in activities that put you in a position of helping others who have less than you. Whether that be financial or educational or maybe it means rocking 'crack babies' at the hospital as a volunteer. Whatever it is, pick something that you are interested in, because you will probably have the most success in that area. This will improve your self esteem which will in turn help build confidence.
If the above does not appeal to you, look into taking a public speaking course. They will teach you all manner of little things to help you deal with 'nervous' situations. Even if you never have to speak publicly, it will help 'stretch your horizons' which, of course, build confidence.
And one more thing that might help, look in your area for an assertiveness training course. This is not a course that teaches you how to be aggressive, but teaches you how to assert yourself graciously in situations that could be awkward. It's a very handy tool to have in the business world and in the neighborhood for that matter. Good Luck.
many people feel that some way
i used to feel that too,there is a good material in how building self confidence http://www.self-esteemnow.com/index.htm?...
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