I'm depressed and I want him out!?
Question:
Part 1
Right now my dad isn't here, he's in another country for work for about a month. Now that he's gone, my mom has to take care of everything. He sends her the money and she takes cares of the rest (since she doesn't have money, and can't work because she doesn't have a good college degree). She just told me yesterday that for my birthday (which was last week) she was the one that bought half of my presents from all her saved up money, and now she doesn't have anymore money from her savings. I hated that.
Part 2
I've been living in this house with this guy my parents knew for seven years. So now that my dad's gone, he's sorta this "substitute" that takes us out and stuff. I never really liked him, since I first saw him as a child. He seems like this nice guy that volunteers to pay for things at times, but.
Answers:
Wow, this is a very sensitive topic. First of all, this guy that living with you guys. It seems that he is trying to take your father's place whether or not he is interested in your mother, which I am sure is not the case. You need to step in and be the man around the house. Obviously, this guy is trying to run you guy's life and be the man of the house. That is unacceptable! If this man is paying rent then he needs to worry about his part of the rent and not worry about your familie's life. If he is not paying rent then you need to take him aside and tell him, "look, we are you letting you stay here because we wanted to help you because you're a close friend of the family.but if you continue to disrespect me, my brother, or my mother.then you're going to have to find another place to live. You have no right behaving the way you do especially in this house. Either respect this house or find someother place to live". Tell him that or flat out tell him to move out. It's interfering with your family.
I'm sorry to hear that you're mother used up all of her savings for your birthday present. I know heart was in a good place.and you shouldn't feel bad. You didn't make her buy it for you. Talk to your mom and tell her that you appreciate all of the amazing gifts that she got you..but that she didn't have to spend all of her savings on it. Be the man figure of the house and talk to your little brother. Tell him that he needs to appreciate his presents and cherish them because it's going to be a while that your mother buys him more presents. Tell him for exchange, he should do chores around the house and help your mother out. I hate to pressure you but you have to step up and be the man of the house....before someone else does. You can't let your family fall apart. I know your dad isn't around.and for whatever reason that is...you have to fill in for him.
For now, if you're old enough to work.get a job to help around the house..but for now, focus on getting that guy out of the house ASAP! It's important.it doesn't matter how well you've known this guy. YOU'RE THE MAN OF THE HOUSE! OWN IT!
Don't expect too much from you're mom..she has a lot on her plate considering that she is temporarily a single parent.
Good luck and God bless!
PLEASE DO NOT HURT YOURSELF OR ATTEMPT SUICIDE. IT'S NOT WORTH IT. THERE ARE PEOPLE OUT THERE WHO HAVE IT A LOT WORSE THAN YOU. IMAGINE HOW YOUR MOTHER WILL FEEL IF SHE FOUND YOU DEAD IN YOUR ROOM? IMAGINE HOW SHE WOULD FEEL. SHE WILL SUFFER SO MUCH. YOU AND YOUR LITTLE BROTHER ARE ALL SHE HAS. DON'T BE THINK SUICIDE IS AN OPTION! DON'T TAKE THE COWARDLY WAY OUT. YOU'RE A MAN! GOD LOVES YOU AND HE WILL MAKE THE WORSE THINGS INTO A WONDERFUL THING. THINK ABOUT YOUR FUTURE. PLEASE DON'T TAKE YOUR PRECIOUS LIFE AWAY. EVERYONE HAS A PURPOSE HERE IN LIFE..AND I BELIEVE YOUR PURPOSE IS TO TAKE CARE OF YOUR MOM AND MAKE CHANGES AROUND THE HOUSE.
Hey, Im sorry to hear what your going through. Mabye you could trying explaining to your brother that with your dad gone your mom can't buy as many things.. And with the whole guy thing, I don't think I can help you there.. have you talked to your dad about him? Hope it gets better.
wow that is a lot to live with. Im sorry I have no answers for you. Have you talked to your mother? Maybe there are ways through social assistance that could help you be free of this torment. I hope things can get better for you.
Be patient. There will be pleasure after hardship. Just stay calm and try to solve all the probs in a civilized matter. Good Luck ;)
That's a lot to handle for someone who is only 15. Have you tried explaining to your mom why you want this guy out? From the way you've described her, it seems like your mom loves you very much. Perhaps if you talked to her she would understand why you'd prefer that this guy was out of your family's life. Do you have school counselor or YMCA where you could get support and help? If not, just remember that "this too shall pass." You may be going through a rough spot right now, but things will get better. To take your mind off of things and too help your mom out, maybe you could get a part time job. I know your life isn't what you want it to be, but you're only 15, and it isn't your job to try and fix everything.
I hope everything works out soon! : )
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