What can you do if you feel certain people have turned against you, and are working against you to stop you?
Question:
im a 30 year old borderline personality disorderer sufferer..ive been through an exceptional amount of abuse, trauma, victimization in my life...my ultimate goal is to relocate from britain...but i feel depressed because that goal seems unreachable to me, because im waiting for therapy right now to try and work on the complex problems i have.plus ive never been employed because of my long standing problems, and have a mental health history....ive endured hardship since 15, where my mental health problems started after prolonged bullying throughout high school...
in the present, i feel certain people are very negative towards me...tell me '' i cant do this'' and '' you cant runaway'' when i explain i want emigrate, which i adimantly do..its like people wont let me forget my past, & have this attitude towards me...i feel held back & trapped by my past, like im being forced to live this way out because society wont let me forget my past..
Answers:
you can prevail. There are 2 things that need to be addressed. First is whether your depression is caused by chemical additives such as MSG in your food. Second is society type factors that everyone faces such as job interviews and rejection. For this you understand that there may be 10 applicants for one job and if only one gets the job then the other 9 are rejected, so the odds of rejection are 9 in 10 where the odds of 'winning' the job is only 1 in 10. This could mean life is tough but you should eliminate the first problem of chemical additives in your food because this is a handicap in life. Try going on a vegetarian diet to eliminate all the msg and see if this will eliminate most of your depression. Usually this means dropping all of your junk food but if this drops your depression, it will be worth it, right?
While outside influences don't make things better, you are in control of yourself. Hopefully you are receiving proper medical treatment for your Borderline personality disorder. Write down your goals and then write down the steps you need to reach them. Show them to your therapist and see if they can help you break them down even more so you can take one small step at a time.
do not listen to any negative people only the positive ones ,your life is in your hands keep trying and eventually you will get there good luck
You can begin by no longer focusing on what happened to you in the past. Everyone has a story to tell.
In the short term, plan to get though your therapy. Your therapist should already have given you an idea of what you need to accomplish in each session and how long it will take.
If they haven't then, ask or change therapist.
Cognitive and Neuro therapist both provide the right training for long term problems.
Once you feel you have mastered the mind training they provide, then think about setting a goal for yourself.
If you want something badly enough there is nothing that can stop you. Not your own fears and not anyone else's opinion.
Read more at my website. The articles are free.
http://themeaningisyou.com
Therapy will help. This will give you someone to talk to that will listen have the understanding to be able to lift you up. Therapy takes time though-but do not despair. Have you ever thought of reaching out to God? Do you eat healthy? I know it sounds unreal but the fact is that you eat healthy you feel better. They have proven that certain food help your mental/emotional state. Serotonin is found in a simple bake potato. Your not a lone. I often feel lonely too. Try to let the past go it will just strangle your advancement. Hugs to you.
just be courageous enough to confront your fears by discussing them with people the moment you begin to feel that they are "in on it" and maybe they will be able to show you that they had no ill wishes towards you- or maybe they will tell you that they do have a problem with something that concerns you... at least you will know if it is real or imagined.
You expect to be happy someday, but not now?
How then will you be happy? Now is all there ever is.
When the future arrives as now, you'll still be saying: "I need to get to the future, to be happy."
Or you will want to be someplace else, instead of where happiness is, which is here. But you're not here. You're not here because you're seeking in the mind.
Peace, happiness, and love are only possible now, this is a sane statement.
You've got everything backwards. you put happiness always somewhere else than right here. That is understandable, but insane. Seeing this is sanity.
Are you satisfied with your current approach? You've said it doesn't work, but I'm asking you to see how.
You resist what is happening now (the cause of all your problems) .This makes you think of the future when what you seek will be.
Future is always beyond your grasp. Now and here has it.
Saying NO to life makes you want to be someplace different.
But. If what you seek is here already and you aren't here, how will you experience it? Be present!
So what you need is to stop seeking, period. You don't need time to do this, you really have to get this: you don't need any time to be here now.
Stop your seeking, saying yes to life as you find it.
Thinking blinds you to what is here already. So be still, neither reaching for or rejecting in mind, embracing life as it is. now.
Hi, have been reading your questions for quite a while now and thought I would reply.
Are you sure these people are really out to stop you, or do you feel that maybe your attitude is colouring things?
You've constantly spoken about leaving the UK to move to the USA/Canada, but do you not think that this great change may not bring the happiness and situation that you think it will? You will still be the same person with the same problems, only without a free health service to fall back on (no DSS or council houses there).
Perhaps you should look at what sessions the local mental health team offer in your area. I have sat through several and they have been a great help.
One thing they always talk about is goal setting. Your goal seems to be to leave the UK for America. To have a realistic chance of this you need to have a job waiting for you, or at least some skills. In goal setting you should break things down into small acheivable steps, rather than just going all out for the end step.
Perhaps, having said you haven't ever worked, then maybe try doing some voluntary work. It won't affect your benefits and will also give you some satisfaction, as well as providing you with a reference. Then start looking for work more in the areas you would fancy doing abroad. Annoying as it may seem, the US and Canada are not going to accept people in who are just going to arrive and claim benefits.
Just break down things into small acheivable steps, rather than wanting everything at once.
You are SUPPRESSED. There is nothing else to it.
Get a copy of "Cause of Suppression" from your nearest Church of Scientology. Refer the website below.
Its a small booklet that does not cost much.
I'm 36 and also have suffered from extreme abuse. My first memories as a child are of abuse. This lasted until I was 18. Then I spent the next few years with the thoughts of abuse. So basically I was abusing myself. It sounds to me like the people around you are afraid for you. Maybe they feel you are not being realistic about your goals. That doesn't mean they are working against you. Most people want to make you feel better. I've learned that over the years. Not all people want to traumatize you or hold you back. Like it or not our past forges who we are and how we think. Plus, as the saying goes-If we forget our past, we are doomed to repeat it. My advice is to get help where you're at now. Take small steps. Try working through some issues. Then maybe get a part time job. Something unstressful like at a library. See how that goes and decide from there. It sounds like you want to take control of your life instead of letting others control it. Good for you. Moving to another country is hard enough. Unfortunately, we take ourselves wherever we go. If your thinking hasn't changed, you may find yourself in a new country with no friends or family and be worse off then now. I went to therapy for a few years and I was helped to make a chart of goals. This may help you. Set small attainable goals. Make sure you include dates of completion with your ultimate goal being to relocate. I hope this helps.
What the poster Dazza doesn't tell you is that scientology will tell you that you have no mental illness at all becasue they don't belive in them. They will tell you to go off any meds you are on.
They will then charge you thousands of dollars for doing it their way.
Please talk to your doctor before you go to any link Dazza put up here. And shame on you Dazza for promoteing scientology here.
For those who want to learn more go to xenu.net and xenutv.com
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