Please please please help me with my situation?


Question:
Uhhh, I cant believe ive become desperate enough to ask for advice from complete strangers, But I don’t think I have any options left. To start off, im 13 and well not your average teenager. It all started happening about 2 years ago. It didn’t come suddenly, but day by day I felt this change in my mood that I dismissed as a change in hormones. I became sort of ‘numb’ to feeling and then I got into these intense lows where I wished for nothing but death. I would cry and come up with scenarios to kill myself. Then if a few days time I would become return to my ‘normal’ state. My parents dont really help either. They fight a lot and then release their negative energy towards me. They yell at me a lot and I cant put into words how much it hurts when they storm into my room and start screaming about my imperfections. About an year ago I slit my wrists and was forced into a psych ward. the whole experience was very traumatic because I was only 12 and didn’t understand why they had to monitor us every minute and had to have mirrors set up in rooms so they could see what we were doing. When I was discharged, my parents were very upset because our insurance could not support my hospital visit, and they blame me for our financial problems. I get flashbacks and nightmares of my stay at the psych ward and I still think about it to this very day. even talking about it now is very hard. Lately I have been getting this really weird ‘mood’. I feel sad and depressed most of the time, but theres these times where I have this feeling of uncontrollable energy and I want to run 5 miles and yell at the top of my lungs, but I cant express it. It’s a strange feeling. Its not necessarily euphoric but its like WHHEEEEEEEEEE. Then I return to my depressed state. I desperately want to visit a doctor about this but unfortunately, my parents are religious nuts who don’t believe in ‘mental illnesses’. They believe that god has his reasons for people to suffer, and I am one of those cases. They refuse to take me to a doctor. I tried talking to counselors at school, but they cant do anything without my parents consent. Help me please. I don’t know what I have or do.

Answers:
sounds like you have bio polar they used to call it manic depression look it up on line and please tell your parents there are medications to make you completely well again
I'm really not an expert or anything, so don't take what I say for absolute truth.
Your flashbacks/nightmares sound like Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, look it up.

The high/low feelings sound typical of being bipolar. :-\

You need some help. If there's anyone that you can talk to in your family that doesn't share your parents' views of mental illnesses, please do! Don't let yourself suffer like that. If you have a friend you trust, maybe talk to their parents. There are also probably hotlines you could call for help. Please look into all your options!
I'm not a doctor and I'm not about to make a diagnosis, just a guess...it sounds to me by the symptoms and behavior you described that you could have Manic Depression. It's also known as BiPolar Disorder. If you want to read some more information about it and see if this sounds like you, heres a helpful website: http://www.allaboutlifechallenges.org/ma...
As for your parents, I think that even if they are religious they should see through that and want to help their child...esspecially if you tried to hurt yourself previously. A lot of the time with a mental disorder, it's nothing that is coming from you...but a chemical inbalance in your brain which needs treatment before it gets worse.
If you really can't see a doctor, and your parents won't allow it...keep a journal and write down everything you feel...this will help let your emotions out and track your mood swings.
First of all, I'm very sorry to hear all of this. You need to really sit down with your parents and tell them that you have thought of suicide and that it is so bad that you need help and are willing to receive help. Tell them that you want to see a counselor (one of high standards than a school one and one that deals with mental illnesses so to speak). When you feel that feeling to just run around by all means run around the blocks a few times, running usually relaxes a lot of people and helps clear their mind. Gosh I so wish I could just come there and knock some sense into your parents and your school. Hope everything works out and remember to think positive. Get some really close friends because they are always good to vent to.
You are definately bi-polar. That is the extreme highs and lows you are experiencing. If I were you I would call someone at the hospital (a nurse). Explain just what you have said here. Perhaps the police could help. Ask them for a councelor. The police have councelors that can talk to you and convince your parents that you need to be seen. Go into search on the computer and look up bi-polar. Compare your problems with the ones they list and see what you think. Then tell the councelors if you have those symptoms. Good luck to you.
You've entered adolescence. It is a period of change and confusion for 99% of the population.

Return to your school counselor and describe yout condition. Frankly, at the age of 13, you're a little young for bi-polar condition, which you seem to be circling in flight. However, it would be a good idea to speak with a professional. Please be advised that most professional counselors have the unpleansant duty of telling people what they don't like or don't want to hear during the course of the treatment. We are the captains of our own ships.

It's a shame that your parents rag on you; however, can you imagine what that bill was like from the hospital without insurance?

Who on earth told you that going to a psych ward was a pleasant and non-nightmarish experience? Of course you have unpleasant memories of this. It is not meant to be Club Med.

Slitting your wrists is known as "acting out behavior." It is the hallmark of the immature individual. It's probably a good idea to drop it from your repetoire, before you are seen as "flaky."
Once people see you as a time bomb ready to blow, you will be lonely to say the least.

It's up to you to navigate this period of time in your life. You have to assume responsibility for your actions and your conditions. It's that simple. And the best way to do this is to forge a meaningful relationship with the school counselor(s) or other agency designed to help young people.

Please keep in mind that most bankruptcies occur because of medical bills. Please try to understand your parent's point of view before condemning them. They likely believe that you had no compelling reason to slit your wrists and were "hurt" by your manipulative actions.
Honey, you have to get help. Can you talk to someone at school? You are smart enough to know that something is not right, so don't let your parents attitudes effect your need for help. You are not asking them for anything that will cause them harm, you are only asking for them to help you. Try a school counselor or teacher. Talking to anyone is better then not talking at all.
Either you get professional help or this will trouble you for the rest of your life. If you feel that your parent's religious affiliations are keeping you from obtaining proper medical care then someone needs to intervene on your behalf.

Most Counties offer social services for those who cannot afford them. Call the Social Services office for your county. Just ask a counselor or teacher at school what county you're in, look up the county's web site and look for social services. They are here for that very reason. Ask your school counselor how to get in touch with state or county social services offices.

Last thing you want to experience is what Tom Cruise's kids are going to suffer just because the parents are members of a cult that doesn't believe in medical or psychiatric treatment.

Seeing that you have already attempted suicide and are a minor, your parents could be facing child endangerment charges for not seeking or allowing appropriate care for you.
You CAN fight pessimism with positive, goal-oriented thinking...
http://watchtower.org/e/20040422/article...

Your life IS Precious!
http://watchtower.org/e/20050201/article...

What you describe you're experiencing sounds like what might be what is called a 'mood disorder'. This can be brought on by stress, which the situation you describe Certainly qualifies as!
http://watchtower.org/library/g/1997/8/8...

Did you know that it has been scientifically documented that just being around angry quarreling can cause actual brain damage, (besides depression)?

And, are you & your school counselors aware of the
UN Declaration of the Rights of the Child?

Excerpts of UN Declaration of the Rights of the Child:

All Children have the RIGHT :

# to affection, love, & understanding...

# to adequate medical services...

# to special care if disabled in ANY way.

# to be among the first to receive protection & relief in ALL circumstances.

# to be protected against ALL FORMS of neglect & cruelty.

# The right to develop one's full potential in DIGNITY...

# The right to be brought up in a spirit of UNDERSTANDING, tolerance, & PEACE...

According to that & your description, your rights are being violated. Call (in the USA) CPS (Child Protective Services).
All professionals who deal with children are legally required to help children who are honestly in need of help, to get that help. If they won't do their part, go straight to CPS. (Have you spoken to the nurse? You might want to try that, first.)

Children deserve to be wanted and loved!
- Mistreatment of children takes many forms...
http://watchtower.org/library/g/2000/12/...

I knew someone raised 'Christian' Scientist...
I imagine he went through at least some of what you describe, & he had Life-Long problems. I suspect that your parent's upbringing also 'left a lot to be desired'!

Keep searching & asking for help!
(When I felt suicidal (as a 14yo) I found Great Comfort in what
I learned from Jehovah's Witnesses.)

Links to several helpful articles follow (notice also the links to related articles on their pages), with many more details:
Hi! First of all you are not alone! This internet is the perfect place to ask for advice! And tho you may not see our faces, we're here and care, ok? If you were in the hospital, then they must have gave u a diagnosis, right? Bipolar or anxiety/depression? Both disorders can cause extreme depression and then tons and tons of ENERGY!! I have anxiety/depression, which is a mood disorder. After a dr. ruled out trauma, blah, blah, blah,... I finally found out I have a chemical imbalance where my brain doesn't get enough seratonin. (stuff that keeps us on an even keel) I take antidepressents now and feel great! But not so long ago, I nearly ended my life too. When I was "up" I felt invincible, but when I was in my "dark" place, everything seemed hopeless. I'm not a kid, mind you. I'm 48! My mood disorder is hereditary. (thanks mom) She, mom, gets so wiggy that she's always taking downers and running off to the E.R. (won't take antidepressents) My sis "meds" herself with drugs and booze. My aunt has tin foil wallpapering her trailor so "they" can't read her thoughts! Your parents mean well, I'm sure. They're just not educated in mood and mental probs. Keep on talkin' to teachers, counselors, suicide hotlines. Call mental health and really stress your feelings! I take one pill a day and it has helped me SO much! One pill! There is help for you, but your'e going to have to be a lot more aggressive in your "shout out!". This is your life, you can be helped, so make calls, tell, tell, tell! Your parents will probably be angry, but they are anyway, right? But peace of mind is EVERYTHING! And you know your'e WORTH it!!!!!! p.s. Please keep in touch. E mail if you want. Will help on this end if you need! Hugs! ooooooooooooooooooo
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