Help with this please?
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Emily,
I lost my Dad 2.5 yrs ago. I loved him a lot and I was very depressed when he died.
Depression is a natural part of grieving. If you hadn't loved your Dad you wouldn't be missing him now.
It's good that you are taking meds and seeing a Therapist. Keep doing that.
The first 6 months are the hardest. The first holidays will be hard, too, I won't lie to you about that. But you WILL get through it. It won't be the same, but you Dad wouldn't want you to grieve for him forever. He would want you to go on with your life.
Now, I'm gonna ask you a question that you may think is mean or really weird... but here goes... Have you gotten mad at your Dad for leaving you, yet? Because anger is a natural part of grieving, too. In case your Therapist hasn't given you Permission to be mad at him, I am giving you permission to be mad. Not forever, but for a little while. Just try it, in your therapist office, yell and scream at him, tell him how mad you are that he Left you. And tell him how much you miss him. Just get it OUT! Once you get it outside of you, instead of holding it inside, I think you'll feel better.
My Therapist had to give me permission to be mad, too. I thought it was strange, and mean at first, then I realized I WAS mad that he was gone. Once I got it OUT, it couldn't hurt me and make me so depressed anymore.
Good Luck.
I am sorry to hear of your loss. I can't imagine what you must be going through.
Remember that depression has many different levels of severity and maybe you are having a rough time rigth now. It may also be that the meds you are on aren't the right ones for you. Please talk to your doctor about this so they can try something new if that's what it is.
Time will help heal your pain--it will never go away completely, but you will learn to deal with it in time, and remember the good times you had together. You of all people know that life is precious--don't waste yours on something you had no control over.
you are gonna have to FIGHT this. i too was in depression but not for the same reason. i had insomnia, i went to eating ALOT, couldn't concentrate. i actually got lost in my neighborhood and couldn't think how to get out. i wouldn't work or be around anyone. i was put on antidepressants and had to see a counselor but in my case it DIDN'T work. i was getting worse everyday. i called on the good Lord, i didnt know when i would finally do myself in. HE healed me!! ive been happy ever since. the depression started in Oct. 2006 and i gave my life in the end of Feb 2007. ive been free from depression ever since.
Eat more! And love his memorey! Why would you let that go so far! I feel the pain my MOM died! But she would like it better this way! Now, I cook! And love the fact I can ..SHe taught me! Cry all you want But...Its time to enjoy and know..He is there and wishes you the best! I bet...Im a dad
You're in mourning, which is really tough when it is a parent. I speak from personal experience....
you are sad and wanting to just hide and die to be with them again. You need to ask yourself if that is what your dad would want?
would he want you to become ill and die, i doubt it...
You have to reach deep inside and tell yourself to pull it together and show your dad what and who you can blossom into. Make him proud, he brought you into this world for a reason, get out there and find yourself again. Once you do, you can look up to him and say, "Dad i hope your proud of me!".
After 5 years i still have pain from losing a parent but i continue to remind myself that when the time is right, we will be together again...
hope this helps.
My condolences,
It is tough losing a parent. Especially what appears to be before their time. I lost my dad 15 month ago. I go through my times having trouble sleeping. Eating comes in spurts and there are times my eyes will water up, no real reason. I think of those times as dad smiling down, at me, saying 'hello'. One suggestion would be, get outside, if nothing more than for a walk. Please make yourself go for 30 minutes. Within that time, find 1 thing that will make you smile. Next time, remember the first thing, and find #2. Continue doing this for at least 3 weeks. Hopefully you will realize that there are good things out there. Yes the bad ones are there, also. But I like to see the positive things. And the day YOU are the one that makes someone else smile, i hope you will see your reason to keep on...
I hope this comes to you and brings you peace.
I kept this till the end, but my other comfort is in believing that I will see my dad in a few years. Well hopefully more than a few, but... Best wishes
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