Anorexic cousin - What should I do?!?
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It all depends how strong the illness is. But thats very kind to want to help, and you definutely can make a difference. The best thing to do is to not bring any attention to her body image at all or her eating. Make sure to eat normally around her, so to make her realise what shes eating is not alot and abnormal, but not actually say it. Try and talk with her about general things, talk with her about future plans etc, and try hard to get her mind of things that are so isolated like body weight and calories etc. try and take her out and do things that make her happy. But never comment on her weight or appearance even if she asks. If she does ask, reply that she doesnt look as good as she used to.and then dont say anymore about it. The more attention people around bring to the persons' illness, the harder it is to shake off as everyone already hav alot of recognition on it. if you need some more afvice, feel free to message me
You can not do a thing.
She has to want help. Her mother, who is her legal guardian, says leave it alone. So you have no choice.
But you could ask her to read this.
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;...
I'm happy to see she is seeking the medical help she needs.. But you have to understand anorexia is a horrible eating disorder that people struggle with for years and years. It sounds like she is trying to get her weight under control.. So constantly bringing it up and making her feel bad about it may not be the way to go. Instead just be there for her and try to restore some of her esteem by reminding her of what a great and beautiful person she is.
There is nothing you can do----it's too much for you to take on, anyway. This is a mental problem even parents can't handle without expert help.
What you CAN do is be the best you you can be, and show her by example, for the brief time you see her during the visit, how healthy you are.
Look at how sick she is, see it clearly, and then bring this knowledge back to your own life, and learn from it. That is all you can do right now---take care of yourself because of this knowledge.
Hi,
I have had the same problem with both of my sisters, and i am afraid to say that i found you can't really talk to her about the subject unless she approaches you first. But you could say to her that you love and care for her a lot and if she needs to talk you are always there, and if she dosen't feel comfortable talking face to face she can always email you.
If she is seeing a doctor and a therapist at least she is talking to someone and they can do something if her health is in danger. Also her mum may feel embarrassed and also unsure what to do. It is very hard to see someone you love going through this but if you offer her your support and a good therapist she can get through it. Both my sisters did.
OK, so you basicly are choosing between a possible future death, or your aunt will be mad at you? Deffinitely talk to her! Even if it doesn't help, at least you tried. And, if she does get better, I'm sure you aunt will be happy and possibly thank you.
You might not like this idea, but this is a good reason to have medical marijuana. Give that girl the munchies.
So let her mom hate you. If she's in trouble which it sounds that way, talk to her. The worst is her mom hates you, but you've helped her. If she looks up to you, it's possible she'll listen to you. She needs to find another therapist if that ones not helping. Anorexia is very dangerous. It sounds like her mom maybe part of the problem. If that was my child I'd be doing everything I could to help her. She needs protein to survive and lettuce and oatmeal won't give her the nutrients her body needs. Maybe your mom would allow her to come move in with you for a while. She needs some better professional help though, and if the doctor she's seeing isn't helping she needs someone else or she could die. Good luck to all of you, and best wishes!
that is sad and a difficult situation. you didnt say how old you are but i assume your not of adult age. im sad to say her mom is in deep denial and probably also hiding how sad she is cause she recognizes this is bigger then she feels she can handle and may have tried alot more then is known to help her daughter. it would not be wrong of you to just talk to your cousin and be friends and if she should happen to confide in you to simply let her know that you are there if she wants to talk and will always love and care about her. that she is very special to you and that she is a very special person to all.
as for her mother she may require an unexpected sit down with the family confronting her all at once. before the family confronts her they should do some research and have information that they should make the mother take. she doesnt have to do exactly what the info says like admitting to eatting disorder clinic or whatever but she needs to be confronted about the dangerous path she is allowing her daughter to lead and may need counseling herself. if possible arranging for a health professional to be present when the mother is confront whether by phone or in person may be of benefit.
your cousin may even benefit from being in separate living situation if adequate care is not available near her and so that she can get help she needs and her mom can take time to focus on how to cope with it and help her daughter deal with it when she is ready to return home.
good luck and god bless you and your cousin and her family.
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