I think i have a mental disease...HELP! UPDATED?
Question:
I didnt clearly state my "symptoms" (if you will).
Ok, i cant sleep because all i hear is noise. it sounds like people are running around or walking by me. all i hear is footsteps, as though everybody in my house is up and walking around (which they are NOT for a fact). also, last night it sounded as though a parrot was squaking over and over, right next 2 me. not outside, RIGHT next 2 me. by the way, i DO NOT own a bird. i also seem 2 have.a dual personality. there seems 2 be 2 parts of my mind, and they constantly...argue with each other, if u will. one seems 2 always be "talking" in my head, and the other one seems 2 be "thinking". Like the talking part of my mind will repeat everything that thinking part does, and then they argue with each other 2 be quiet...
um yes, i realise this sounds crazy, but its true.
so, how do i tell my mom without sounding crazy?
Answers:
You aren't "crazy" and you don't sound "crazy". Your symptoms are very real to you, and that should be taken seriously. You said you can't sleep, so it's interfering with your life. What you describe isn't normal. You need to see a doctor and talk with him/her openly and honestly about your symptoms.
Best way to bring it up with your mom is to tell her that you're not really feeling like yourself lately, and that you'd like her to take you to the doctor (I would try to see a doctor rather than a counselor, as medication might be the answer). This could be a very real medical condition and the only way to know is to talk to a medical professional you trust.
Good luck!
EDIT: After reading your latest update, I think you need to get into the doctor ASAP--it could be something more serious than the chemical imbalances that lead to most "mental illnesses". It could also be a result of extreme sleep deprivation, which is much less serious. But you NEED to find out!!
By Ralph Hoffman
Professor of Psychiatry at Yale University
You are in a crowd when you hear your name. You turn, looking for the speaker. No one meets your gaze. It dawns on you that the voice you heard must have sprung from your own mind.
This foray into the uncanny is as close as most people come to experiencing auditory hallucinations or “hearing voices,” a condition that affects 70% of patients with schizophrenia and 15% of patients with mood disorders such as mania or depression. For these individuals, instead of hearing just one’s name, voices produce a stream of speech, often vulgar or derogatory (“You are a fat whore,” “Go to hell”) or a running commentary on one’s most private thoughts.
The compelling aura of reality about these experiences often produces distress and disrupts thought and behavior. The sound of the voice is sometimes that of a family member or someone from one’s past, or is like that of no known person but has distinct and immediately recognizable features (say, a deep, growling voice). Often certain actual external sounds, such as fans or running water, become transformed into perceived speech.
One patient described the recurrence of voices as akin to being “in a constant state of mental rape.” In the worst cases, voices command the listener to undertake destructive acts such as suicide or assault. But hearing voices is not necessarily a sign of mental illness, so understanding the mechanics of auditory hallucinations is crucial to understanding schizophrenia and related disorders.
For example, your occasional illusionary perception of your name spoken in a crowd occurs because this utterance is uniquely important. Our brains are primed to register such events; so on rare occasions the brain makes a mistake and reconstructs unrelated sounds (such as people talking indistinctly) into a false perception of the spoken name.
Hallucinated voices are also known to occur during states of religious or creative inspiration. Joan of Arc described hearing the voices of saints telling her to free her country from the English. Rainer Maria Rilke heard the voice of a “terrible angel” amidst the sound of a crashing sea after living alone in a castle for two months. This experience prompted his writing the Duino Elegies.
How can we understand differences between an inspired voice, an isolated instance of hearing one’s own name, and the voices of the mentally ill? One answer is that “non-pathological” voices occur rarely or perhaps only once. Not so for the person with mental illness. Without treatment, these experiences recur relentlessly.
Brain imaging studies have found that parts of the temporal lobe activate during these hallucinations. Our research at Yale University, as well as studies conducted at the Institute of Psychiatry in London, also detected activation in an area of the brain known as Broca’s region during production of “inner speech” or verbal thought.
One theory is that voices arise because Broca’s area “dumps” language outputs into parts of the brain that ordinarily receive speech inputs from the outside. To test this theory we are using trans-cranial magnetic stimulation (TMS) to reduce the excitability of portions of the temporal lobe and Broca’s region.
So far, most patients appear to experience significant improvements from TMS directed to both brain regions, with improvements lasting from two months to over a year. These results, although preliminary, suggest an alternative treatment if validated in larger-scale studies.
What remains unaddressed is the root cause of abnormal brain activations. We are pursuing three intertwined ideas. The first is based on studies suggesting that schizophrenia patients suffer from reduced brain connectivity. As a result, certain groups of neurons, such as those responsible for producing and perceiving language, may begin to function autonomously, beyond the control or influence of other brain systems. It is as if the string section of the orchestra suddenly decided to play its own music, disregarding everyone else.
The second idea is that deprivation of social interaction—namely human conversation—makes the brain more likely to produce hallucinated conversations. Often one of the first signs of schizophrenia—occurring well before manifestations such as hearing voices—is social isolation.
Indeed, sensory deprivation can produce hallucinations in the sense mode that is deprived. An example is Charles Bonnet Syndrome, where visual impairments in the elderly can produce visions of human figures. Could the absence of actual spoken human conversation—a cornerstone of day-to-day human intellect and creativity—produce hallucinated conversations? Recall the extreme isolation that preceded the appearance of Rilke’s startling voice.
Third, heightened emotions may play a role in producing voices. Indeed, heightened emotionality prompts the brain to produce information consonant with that emotional state. For example, a low mood favors generation of thoughts that are themselves depressing. It is possible that intense states of emotion could pre-select and perhaps elicit from the brain certain verbal messages having the same emotional charge.
Verbal messages expressed by voices often are highly emotional. Moreover, when schizophrenia begins, these persons are often in states of extreme fear or elation. It could be that these powerful emotional states increase the propensity of the brain to produce corresponding verbal “messages.”
This would account for the fact that voices also emerge during states of extreme, but incidental, emotionality brought on by inspired thought, mania, depression, or ingestion of certain drugs. Here the voices disappear when the emotional states return to normal. The brains of schizophrenia sufferers may be vulnerable to becoming “stuck” in these hallucinatory states.
Our hypothesis is that voices arise from different combinations of these three factors—reduced brain integration, social isolation, and high levels of emotionality. This view has become the focus of efforts to understand and help patients with mental illness quiet their minds.
Hon, you couldn't even tell us and not sound crazy, so think about it. LOL
Hello!
relax. we all go through such syndromes once in a while in life. You have the courage to seek help and others are not.
Try to spend much time with others and avoid being lonely.If you are going through any emotional crisis, seek help. there are councilling groups who can help you
do not decide things on your own. For all you know, the problem may not be a serious one at all
I think you should go see an audiologist and see if those noises you're hearing aren't based in some sort of hearing or auditory problem. Just because you hear odd noises it does not necessarily follow that you "are" crazy. But I can see how that would drive you "crazy." The "2 parts of my mind" thing just sounds like teenage confusion. You're possibly a bit neurotic but so are we all in some way or another.
Not being able to sleep will really screw you up though. You have to get your rest. One thing is certain: You can't go on like this and you need to tell your Mom about it right now! Don't worry about sounding "crazy." If you were crazy you'd believe that the parrots were real and if others tried to say they weren't you would think THEM crazy! So you're not crazy ok?
You do need to get checked by a Doctor asap for the noises and the sleeplessness.
As to a "dual personality" - those who do have split personalities are unaware of that fact. So you don't have that either. The mind can be very active. I would say that you sound upset, tense, stressed. But not crazy.
Talk to Mom asap and get checked by a doctor. Audiological tests- if necessary see a Psychiatrist.
I can understand how scary this is!
BUT generally if you can consciously think "I'm crazy" then you are not.KWIM? At the point that insanity sets in, believe me, you won't be aware of it.
It very well could be a mental or mood disorder, but I doubt it is to a degree that warrants panic.
First! Make a Appt with your doctor. You need to see someone about this. No need to worry about being locked up. They only "send you away" if you are at the point of hurting yourself or others. It doesn't sound like that is the case with you...
Second! It seems like silence tends to "trigger" the symptoms, so keep a radio or TV on low when you are alone. Falling asleep to the low murmur of an old "Seinfeld" episode might help you drift off a little easier:)
A professional will be able to tell whether you might truly have something wrong or if you are just extremely stressed.
Honestly, stuff like this happens to most people at some point in their life...they just happen to keep it to themselves.
Make a Dr Appt...don't panic...and keep a radio or Tv on at night...
Hang in there!
you had better refers back to your memory.
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