What do you see in his future?

Question:

my ex bf&i wer 2gether for 2 yrs.We broke up about 6 mons. ago,but I cant get over him&move on. Im in college now&have met a really nice guy, who shows an interest in me. I dont know y,but i cant just let myself have fun with him&like him on a dif.level(it has been like this w/2 other guys since the breakup w/ my ex)i think its bc i cannot get over him, but hes HORRIBLE&was so unhealthy4me.i never want2get back w/him, but@the same time i still care about him&dont understand why?he was physically&mentally abusive.he has add OCD&was put on antidepressants right b4 we brokeup(he broke up w/ me saying he was happy on his meds&didnt need me2b happy)it all took a toll on me phychologically&i am still healing.him&his parents knew i kept him as "in line" as he could b when i was w/ him.since the breakup,he has gotten a DUI,gotten involved w/ cocaine, gotten a speeding ticket4going140&gotten kicked out of his house.i ran in2 him not long ago&he seems happy.do u think he'll ever change his ways?

Answers:
After being with someone for 2 years it can take some time to recover, especially if you really loved the person. I still think of my favorite boyfriend and I am 55. It was a good decision to break up with him since he was abusive. It is the right thing to look out for yourself. When you still care about someone, you care about how their life if progressing. You don't have control over their decisions and you can't change them either. This is the road they have chosen and you should not worry about him anymore. He will probably change in time, since it sounds like he is still very young. It takes awhile for guys to grow up. Just let him go, pray for him because God can change him. Just take it slow with new relationships, you will be okay and what you are experiencing is normal reactions to caring for someone. You must have a big heart.

Hopefully he will hun! But it sounds like right now he is not really to happy, by his actions, I think he is just telling you that. I hope he grows up soon, before it is to late. Before he does something that will get him in a lot more trouble than he is in now. There isn't anything you can do other than talk to him, but if he was abusive to you, he may not listen. I wish you better luck hun, you need to move on. You have a whole new life ahead of you, the skys the limit, so many doors will be opened for you now. try to think positive and be confident, try to relax around your other guy friends and live at the moment and don't think about your past. Treat these new guys like they treat you, if they treat you like a princess, treat them like a king, if they are bad news, move on, you don't need a bad relationship. You sound very smart! Keep your chin up and live your life to the fullest! hugs! Von

You need to think about YOUR future. All this guy can do is drag you down and get you more and more involved and drinking and doing coke. Wait til you smoke crack with him, and don't tell me you won't. People start to do what others around them do. I have lived this and ruined my life. You need to be with good guys who are good for you. Not every night can be a coked up, alcohol-fueled lets-dance-on-the-counter night. (Sometimes you fall off, and someday you won't be able to get back up.) Not as in the old lady in the commercial, I am talking about life and career blown for the "fun" guy. Do you know how many girls I met in prison who were there for their exciting guys? Did that sentence disclose how my life has been? My "fun" guy died last month. Partied his way to the grave. Make your choice. Fun and short and at times agonizingly horrible life or steadily good and blessed. We have free will, the choice is yours.

What do you see in his future?

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