Anxiety Disorder, something worse is wrong with me!?
Question:
I just keep thinking it HAS to be something worse, because people like me who have control of their life do not get stuff like this. I have every symptom and multiple doc's agree its GAD but i cannot convince myself...and will not take daily meds because i am stronger than that, and for the love of my wife, i will not turn into a zombie. i feel so hopeless...but im not depressed...at all, im happy about everything in my life EXCEPT this so called anxiety disorder...
anyone else ever thought they had a brain tumor? i just cant get rid of the idea.no cancer runs in any side of my immediate or distant, and i have already had CT scans of my NECK and down...they said i look great.why am i like this. :(
Answers:
Hi! I feel your pain, I do. I had a death in my family this past Christmas day and then 10 days later I myself had a miscarriage. I had to have surgery to have the fetus removed. About a month later my problems started. First sign I had was chest pains that sent me to the ER. Now given I am a healthy 25 year old so I was worried about it being my heart. After much blood taken and many tests I was ruled fine. I followed up with Dr. who gave me Zoloft and also Ativan. I did not take them for one I did not want to become dependent on them and two, I was terrified of the side effects that I read so much about. I instead thought it was a possble hormanal imbalance from the miscarriage that I requested to be put back on birth control and see of that helped.
I have been on since March and it seemed to help some. I still have the anxiety, but not like it was. I too think something is wrong with me a lot of the time. every pain I get I wonder if it is really something more. I can control it now with massages I sometimes get, bubble baths and I also see a counselor when needed. My life is great, I really have nothing to be upset about. I am getting married in a few weeks actually. I have a great fiance who is supportive and also a close support system that helps me immensely. Without them, I might be worse off.
I do still have my meds and someday if they are truly needed I will give them a go, but so far I have not needed them. I always have the ativan in my purse in the event of an attack but again, have not needed them.
regarding your wifes miscarriage, I have been there and I feel for the both of you. I myself and scared to try again, thinking that the same thing will happen again. I was fine before that happened to me and I haven't been the same since. Do feel free to contact me via email if you would like to know anything else.
Good luck to you.
It's not a brain tumor. Signs of a brain tumor are major headaches and seizures, slurring speech. You do have anxiety. It has nothing to do with being strong or weak. It's a chemical in the nerves of your brain that isn't being released properly. Take the meds your doctors gave to you. Anxiety doesn't have a stigma in society anymore (there's no longer a ship of fools!). You're no good to yourself or your wife if you're ranting and raving about having a brain tumor when, in reality, you have an illness that could be kept completely under control if you'd just take your meds!
I've truly been that way for the past fifteen years. Through the looking glass you know? I can tell you that I wouldn't be at all concerned in your position. As far as where I'm sitting it seems ludicrous for you to think you have a brain tumor. But, yes that's something I've gone through for quite a while now, which amplifies my anxiety a thousand fold. When I was first given the suggestion to meditate I thought it was absolutely foolish, but I took it and made it something of my own. My way of meditating is to focus on something I find really pleasant, that usually helps me. The trouble is, finding that something, it has to be really special to you. I hope this helped you some, but if it didn't, don't worry, you don't need any help. You're perfectly healthy.
Sometimes excessive worry can happen to us when we're really stressed. Our worries can fixate onto certain things. I thought I had a brain tumor too a couple of years ago. I was going through a very stressful time in my life and I just didn't feel right...I thought I was really sick. The only thing that helped was to have a head CT. Why have you only had one from your neck down? After my scan, I was able to rationalize to myself that my stress was resulting in these thoughts that I was sick. Your and your wife have had a recent loss that's extremely painful...you were fine before the loss...you'll be fine again. Seek a therapist if this doesn't get resolved soon. Good luck.
The solution is so simple you may miss it.Listen to me a fellow sufferer.It only bothers you when you think about it right? So, dont think about it! Distraction is the key!Nothing lasts forever. Nothing good or nothing bad.All things must come to an end.In the mean time, distract yourself every time you start to get sucked into the madness. I have suffered from a thousand afflictions for over 40 years. I understand, believe me. You will be ok. You will go on and live a happy,peaceful life. Peace to you.
Given your symptoms, you should accept your physician's help. If you were "stronger than that" you could fight off your delusions. You aren't fighting them off so you need to come to the realization that you are not stronger. Give yourself this reality check, because it is important to your well-being.
Next ask your doctor what he/she would prescribe. Given your strong symptoms, I think you should take your doctor's advice. But, if you won't than at least go to your health store and get a substitute for the medication you were supposed to take. Ask your doctor what neurotransmitters would be affected by his prescription and then do the research to find natural remedies. L-Theanine a green tea extract works on GABA which is common cause of anxiety. L-Tyrosine works on dopamine and Norepinephrine, St John's etc works on Serotonin. You need to be aware of the side effects of all of these substances in case you have health problems that would preclude taking these.
Your mental health is in a fragile state. Your choice to deny your brain the neurotransmitters that it badly needs could lead to a further deterioration.
I have GAD too. Trust me, meds can really help. I take 10 mg of Lexapro and it has really improved my symptoms. I'm not a zombie at all. I don't have any side effects from the medication. I just felt lethargic for the first week of taking the medication. I always think I'm dying of something. Its just something extra I worry about. I'm always convinced I'll die in my sleep or I have multiple blood clots in my body. Any ache or pain I feel seems like a blood clot to me. It's all in my imagination. Its just my nature to worry about anything and everything. But trust me, talk to a psychiatrist and don't rule out medications. I've had really good luck with Lexapro and I'm myself, just better with less anxiety.
i have also had a problem in my life for a short period with gad. i , was like you, thinking i can handle it, because after all i was a mental health professional, and felt i could handle it. what a stupid mistake, i suffered needlessly for about 3 years. when i looked back , after i felt better, i should have taken some medications, to help me through this period. my anxiety was not as bad as yours, but it also made my life miserable. i had patients on medications for anxiety and they were not zombies, and it does not mean you need to be on medication, for the rest of your life. i have seen very small amounts of medication do wonders for a person.. my advice is take some medications, along with therapy from a good therapist, and your life, and i would think the life of your wife, would greatly improve. it is NOT a so called anxiety disorder, it is real and very pain full way to live. the treatment for this has a good prognosis. i hope i have not been too harsh , but i feel bad for you, and know there is a better way for you to live. hope this helps you.
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