What if I turn into my mother??
Question:
I won't go into details unless you ask me to, but my mother always prefered her party life friends and boyfriends than us, she lies all the time, she make nice friends then lies to them, borrow money from them and just abuse there kindness
she lies so much we actually think she is ill, she told people that she is a nurse wich is not true, she lies about every aspect of her life to everyone, friends, family, strangers.
My brother actually hasn't spoken t her in 10 years because of that, myself I wish I had nothing to do with her but she is my mother and I feel responsible for her, my sister I think is only talking to her because she is the oldest and I think she feels responsible for the family stability.
I am just so fed up with all her lies
Answers:
If you concentrate on being the best you can be you will nothing like your mother. You know that what she had done was wrong so you know what not to do.
Dont be worrying , u got out of that bad habit so i say wou wont turn into a bad person
I used to worry about the same thing, but not for the same reasons. I honestly believe that we learn from our parents. This includes learning what we don't like. I do not have my mothers, or fathers bad traits and my children do not have mine. Some things are genetic, but we are not talking about people with diabetes or familial diseases.
Personality is different for each person.
Hey I think you're as likely to turn into your mother as i am!! You see her for what she is and you have learnt that you don't like it. Use that determination to make yourself a better person and find the right person for you. At least you will be well practised at working out if someone is lying to you!! Congratulations i say i think you're doing real well. If this is really getting you down go talk to the doc about it, tell him/her everything, the truth and he/she will help.
Well because of the negative effect your mother's life has had on you, you already know you won't be like her. It is very hard to be hurt by someone and then turn into them. By growing up feeling that the way you were treated was wrong, you grew up finding the right way on your own. and thats great! So congrats!
That wasn't the best upbringing, and you really do have reason to work your issues through. Someone trained to get you from where you are now to where you want to be makes a lot more sense than some unknown person on the Internet or even a well meaning friend. Find yourself a therapist that you can respect and trust. It's not a sign of weakness. It shows a clear desire for health.
Well, I think that by acknowledging that you DO NOT want to be like your mom is the first step in not becoming like her.
You are already seeing how she's using and abusing her friends. You just need to make a conscience effort to not do that in your life.
Find someone that you do look up to, and follow in their footsteps to become a better person. I know that there are "Big Brother & Sister" programs that might be able to help you with this.
I want you to read an amazing book - "The Glass Castle" by Jeanette Walls. She grew up in a very dysfunctional home, her father drank, her mother was an "artist."
She and her brother and two sisters grew up moving around to place after place, mostly neglected, dirt poor. She writes about her parents without bitterness, but talks about changing and being different and breaking away. She is now a very successful reporter for MSNBC. This book gives every kid who ever felt bad about a parent, permisson to separate - to detach with love. You are not your mother - you are you. Do not feel guilty for seeing her flaws - that's just the good you.
Be well darling, and continue surround yourself with people whose characteristics and traits you admire. You will be fine.
you idiot gives the worst answers ever.as for this i won't answer,give me your ten points instead
No one can really answer your question.They do not know your mother or for that matter you however i will say this you make your own way in life Maybe the way your Mother took was right for her in that particular time in her life.Your mother sounds like she was looking for something. Acceptance ,love,validation, As for the lying Maybe thats the only way she can except her life and her choices. Have you ever sat and talked to her?Tell her how you feel . .I did with my mother and in doing so i came to truly for give her. myself i did not go that way i married my first boy friend and have been married for 20 years So live your life your way make your choices and your own misstates thats life not always a bunch of roses theres thorns too .
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