I am very depress, Any jokes or tease so I can start laughing?
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The psychology professor had just finished a lecture on mental health and was giving an oral test.
Speaking specifically about manic depression, she asked, “How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth screaming at the top of his lungs one minute, then sits in a chair weeping uncontrollably the next?”
A sports-minded young man in the rear raised his hand and answered, “He’s probably a basketball coach?”
Lori, the pert and pretty nurse, took her troubles to a resident psychiatrist in the hospital where she worked. "Doctor, you must help me," she pleaded. "It has gotten so that every time I date one of the young doctors here, I end up in bed with him. And then afterward, I feel guilty and depressed for a week."
"I see," nodded the psychiatrist. "And you, no doubt, want me to strengthen your willpower and resolve in this matter." "For God's sake, NO!" exclaimed the Nurse. "I want you to fix it so I won't feel guilty and depressed afterward."
I used to be schizophrenic, but we're better now.
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill herself, is it considered a hostage situation?
I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!
If you're happy and you know it see a shrink
Of course I'm in shape. Isn't Round a shape?
Brain Transplant
After running a series of tests, the doctor said to his male patient, "You have something seriously wrong with your brain. You will need a brain transplant immediately. We have both female and male brains. The female brain is $500 dollars and the male brain is $5,000 dollars." The man asked, "What is the difference between a male brain and a female brain?"
The doctor replied, "The difference is…… the female brain is used."
Hmmm...I don't have any good jokes! I wish I did. But I like to go to gossip blogs when I feel down. Don't know why! My favorite is dlisted.com.
Hope you cheer up :)
Ay bay bay, let me buy you a drank!
how do you drive a blonde crazy/
nothing, shes that way already
Just try to think about the good things that have happened in your life. You will feel a lot better.
There was a woman who had a lovely garden but she had one major problems, she couldn't get her tomato's to ripen. She asked her neighbor, who had bright red tomato's what his secret was. He confessed that once a day he exposed him self nude to the tomato's and they turned red from embarrassment.
After a couple of weeks the neighbor asked the lady how the "little trick" worked on her tomato's.
She excitedly replied "it did nothing to my tomato's but you should see what it did to my cucumbers"...LOL...Maby its not that funny to you.
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