Is 30 years old, old to have never had a girlfriend? ive had mental health probs since 15, never been?
Question:
i feel like im the only one whos had it this bad.
today i keep myself locked in doors because of high levels of anxiety and panic, and rage..im scared of going out incase i lose it or have a rage outburst.
so i spend every lonely , waking day in my apartment. worrying frantically, racing thoughts. extreme lows and depression. weathering the bpd.
my psychiatrist doesnt feel i need any meds, because there addictive and no meds work for bpd. but im beggining to wonder about this.
i keep dwelling on my past, the fact ive missed out big time, never made any friends, never had a girlfriend, never been employed. and yet i wont give up because i have ambition i wanna reach. to emigrate from uk.
Answers:
aha! i knew there was some goal that could provide motivation for the complete self-image metamorphosis that you need and are, i think, quite ready to begin. now this country is probably where you will find more people that have problems similar to yours, and maybe other bi-polar PTSD sufferers can help by telling you their stories and letting you give them your support. and there are girls that haven't met you here, have no contact to your "friends" there that seem to undermine your best efforts...
i have an odd feeling about this because the girlfriend problem is not going to be so hard to get through once your self-esteem improves... you may just need a little physical practice with someone who can be your friend instead of a potential life partner. and if you want to meet me when you get here i will provide you with all the support you need as long as you keep it from becoming an OBSESSIVE need. i have a lot of problems that stem from my desire to help guys with their sexual confidence; but i am so genuinely fond of men and all that their psyches contain that i want to help them be as aware of their likable qualities as i am, and to deal with problems as problems with a solution...
so what is your time frame that you feel you can realistically manage to emigrate?
You can stop telling yourself these stories of your problems and embrace life as it is.
For a person who lives here now in the present moment, problems aren't real.
You are not the only one, I know someone else with bpd and says the same.
She is 52, single, lives with her mother, but has a job (she says she hates it). Her case was worse, and she did need meds, still takes them, and required hospitalization twice when she was younger Feels terrible around her recently remarried sister.
But she has a strong family support, and a best friend she calls by telephone sometimes...
If someone else can overcome it, you can, if you want to. Break your own boundaries.
Try to go to another doctor and let him/her get you on a medication regiment for your issues then go out and make friends. It's not that hard to do. You can overcome this. Just tell yourself you are better than those who did this to you and rise above the pain. It may take some time but you can do it. Let the doctor help you go through a program that helps people with your problems get a job. I'm sure there's hope for you. thirty is not that old. I'm fifteen years older then you and I'm still young.
Mate the only one who can change your life is you. I get that you have a serious mental illness, but you have to put in effort to get where you want to be. If your doctor thinks that med's are not the answer then find something that is. Sitting on your a.ss complaining to the world is not helpful. All of us that have serious illness eventually get to the point when we have to take control, get off your butt and do something ... anything that will get you out into the world. It isnt easy, it takes balls but it is worth it
You are not alone out there. Also, 30 is very youg . I have bipolar real bad. I have alot of your symptoms too. You probaly need to get on meds immediately. This will help with all those nasty feelings you have. PLEASE dont waste anymore time and get to a Doc. You are going to be ok. I am still working on myself, and guess what i am 45 yrs old. Don't give up. There is hope for you. YOU ARE NOT ALONE OUT THERE. OK. Go to bipolar happens.com it helps.
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