What is wrong with me??.is this depression?
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I think it could possibly be a mild form of depression ... in other words, I don't think you'd be diagnosed as "clinically depressed"
Sounds more like something called "social anxiety" since you specifically mention situations in which you feel like it doesn't matter whether or not you show up when and where you're expected. This is a disorder characterized by the person suffering from it not realizing or appreciating that his or her actions DO have an effect on others. Worry is also a common feature of this disorder.
You mentioned your SAT test, so I'm assuming you're a teen ... I hope you understand that being unsure of yourself during your high-school years is VERY common!
I hope you'll talk to your parents, your doctor, or a school counselor or another trusted adult about how you're feeling ... and I can assure you that you are NOT alone in feeling the way you do. You DO seem very mature to have realized that something is bothering you and to be able to describe it so well. Good luck to you ... I'm pretty sure you'll be fine and you'll feel a lot better after talking with someone who understands.
It sounds more like your anxious. Of course, anxiety can lead to depression. I was like this before as well, and I still am like that sometimes. The best thing I think you can do is force yourself to go to your appointments (you may not like it, but see it as an acomplishment instead of a burden), and if you aren't dressed right for an occasion live it up anyway. Worrying is part of life, you just have to learn to be in control of your worries and not let your worries control you! Good luck!
i don't think you are depressed. sounds like social anxiety. see a psychiatrist. medication will help you
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