How to feel happy?
Question:
I know these things are bad, but it seems like the only way to keep happy. I am a much happier person than I used to be, but that it is because these habits have replaced my feeling horrible; although not so much the cutting, I haven't done it for awhile (though I did do it today - first time in maybe a month).
I don't really want therapy because I don't want my family to think I am a nutcase and I don't want to drag everyone into my problems. I just want to feel better, without having to resort to these mechanisms, but then again, I'd rather live like this than live feeling horrible without doing these things.
Any thoughts?
Answers:
when you do those things, you are only living in the moment. you never think about the future or how much those cuts are going to hurt tommorow or how the pills could hurt your health. You are living moment to moment and setting yourself up for failure and unhappiness. If you keep on doing that, there is no way you can be truly happy. Your family won't thin kyou are a nutcase. you don't even have to tell them everything. just go and say "can i see someone, ive been bummed and I want some professional help" it may be hard to say, so leave a note for your folks. it will be hard, but don't drop out. if you have gotten up the courage to ask, hang in there and go through with it. you can tell the person about your cutting,drug use and substance abuse. you NEED to. if you don't you will end up living a full life of hell and dependence. you don't want that. personally, i hate shrinks,but go along with it and get the help you need. best wishes.
First of all, get out there! Go volunteer for your community, acquaint yourself with the less fortunate. With just that, you will be able to form bonds with others and see how good you really have it! I know I have by doing the same.
All over the world people are suffering from physical and mental scars. There has always been the phrase 'There is someone always out there who is better than you.'
Please remember the fact that there is always someone somewhere who has it worse than you. This is in no way saying that your problems are meek or selfish, not like that at all. I am merely saying if you look through there eyes you can begin to see how treasured you are and begin to treasure yourself. There is always someone out there to love you and respect you. Heck, I can love and respect a person for just the fact that they are a human being who are going through trials and tribulations in life.
You are beautiful just because of the fact that you are human and you are willing to love yourself, even if the process is seeming a little difficult at the moment. If nothing else, and you are at a lost to find a good quality about yourself, remember that you want to make yourself better and that is wonderful. That means you care and respect yourself.
So, once again, put yourself out there. Once you give out love and respect, it will be returned to you. But in the meantime, remember once again that someone else needs the same love that you need.
You are a person. You are priceless. You are vital to this world. You are a human being who I admire and who many are going to learn to.
Keep on keepin' on. I truly hoped that I have made you felt better. I have gone through similiar things.
I have told this to another person who is also experiencing similiar feelings.
REHAB!!!
:] geesh just go shopping or to the beach play a sport or something there must be something out there that you would enjoy
or just watch some porn!
Why do you cut yourself? That is what you have to find out.
I am a long time anxiety/depression sufferer so maybe you are in so much emotional pain that doing something physical to yourself takes away the mental pain.
You need to live life to the fullest
I know that is the preppiest expression ever it is true
find a good man and have sex all nite. soon you will forget the problem
go to the Morrie and slap your an then smile you'll be okay or make a funny face or what funnest home video
WOW OUCH happiness comes form with in.. I really suggest that you do see a doc, and NO I do not suggest this hardly ever....sometimes sometimes there really is a chemical imbalance( not a nutcase!). Your family doesn't have to know, but the better you feel the more you will want to share with them... Please I have a feeling by what you have said that this is not a case of loony bin, but a real medical problem one that can be fixed... imbalanced sometimes are from just what we are eating or mold in the home?? many reasons! Go seek some medical assistance... TELL THEM THE TRUTH ABOUT THE CUTTING and hairspray sniffing...they are signs of a medical imbalance
i know how you feel because i used to cut myself and i knew i had a good life with a good home life and everything.
i got out of that by not being alone. always being around someone else, preferably a happy person that i could talk to.
then you should focus on the small things that will help you and make you positive until the next day like that your favorite T.V show is on soon or tomorrow is Saturday and you can sleep in.
next don't think too much. time to think will leave you thinking of the bad things and the things that will make you sad so sit up with your family at night to watch a DVD instead of going to bed just to lay there when you aren't even tired.
and also listen to happy music and not emo stuff if you don't wanna feel like it. watch feel good movies and play happy games rather than depression themed ones.
good luck :-) and also if you ever need someone to talk to i am here.
Try "The Serenity Prayer" for starts.
Then understand that happiness only exists fleetingly. As soon as you're "happy," along comes a tooth ache or bill. Contrary to popular belief we are not supposed to be happy all the time; in fact, we weren't put on earth to be happy, at all.
Happiness comes from acceptance and the ability to see treasures in the mundane things and people around you.
As a nurse once told me in an ER last year, "you can either be "'happy' or 'sad'." It's your call.
I cant believe not one person suggested some sort of spiritual resolution. Without isolating any one religion or belief, I will just say that seeking some sort of higher power is beneficial. even if everything ever said about God is a lie and we are really here all alone to just live out our days and die, it doesnt matter. The illusion of a higher Power is more comforting then any pill, drug or drink.
I always say that there is a difference between Happiness and joy. Happiness is a temporary thing.. its circumstantial... when things are going good, or your doing something fun ( sex, drugs etc) then you feel happy... but when your done, you come down, and usually feel even worse then before.
Joy on the other hand is deeper. It is not about being happy with your circumstance, but being happy with the person in the circumstance.YOU! If you dont have the love and support of family and friends to constantly remind you that you are worth a dam,,, then forget it...rely on something higher. Its worth a try!
Just start by picking up a book.. Bible, Koran..whatever.. then try switching up your music... then try closing your eyes and talking out loud to whoever you believe is up there... you never know, you just may get a reply!
God Bless!
I can see how you do not want people who know you to think you are a 'nutcase" because you are asking complete strangers for advice on your situation. What do you think your family thinks about you when they see you with cuts or scars? I bet they do not even see the cuts. Please know I am not making fun of you I am only pointing out a flaw I see in your personality, although I doubt you enjoy hearing about it.
However all it truly means is that you have low self esteem. You should be less concerned with how others think of you and you should be more concerned on how to make yourself a better person on the inside. So what if your family thinks you are a psyco?
By not getting the proper help you are dragging everyone into your problems. Your emotions radiate from you, and into those around you. It is like the giggle effect. Once one Person in a small group of people starts giggling, it spreads till everyone involved in the conversation is giggling.
If you want to "feel happy", You need to get out and do the things you once enjoyed doing, do not fret the small stuff, and do not dwell on all the bad things that happen to you, because that will not help you at all.
By the way You first line somewhat angers me because you make it seem like all those who have mental problems who seek medical / therapeutic treatment are druggies who want to "pop" pills. I will just hope you did not mean it to come out that way, but just in case... I can assure you the number of people who actually enjoy taking medicine to treat their mental disorders is probably few or perhaps even none, but at least they are smart enough to seek help that works.
volunteer
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