what kind of personal message of support can i write for someone that is battling breast cancer?


Question:
I know what I want to say, I'm just having a hard time putting it into words. What's appropriate? I'm not very close with the girl that has cancer, but I am her brother's girlfriend. I think the family is dealing well with this.so nothing too deep or heavy, any suggestions? thanks.

Answers:
When my mom was diagnosed, there wasn't much to SAY. It was all about actions. We took her to go get her wig and we did not act as though it was her funeral. We acted like we were beauty shopping. When it came time for chemo, she never went alone. Just things like that. Be supportive of her and try to keep her spirits up. Ask her how she is feeling and genuinely care about her answer. It was hard for us because we wanted to fix it for my mom and we couldn't fix it. So we hugged her and listened to her talk about it. I'm going to repeat that, LISTEN to her talk about it. Do not let her talk herself into thinking this is a death sentence for her. My mom was stage 3 and had 2 lumps. She had a masectomy, chemo, and radiation and she is doing great today. We can't wait for Mother's Day on Sunday.

Other Answers:
I've been there-my husband's mom had cancer 8 yrs ago. Just get her a card that lets her know you're thinking of her and write that even though you aren't close,you wish her a fast recovery and that you're praying for her if that applies to the religion the family follows.
If you feel comfortable with it,let her know you're there to talk to if she needs it. Sometimes venting one's anxiety to someone a bit distant can be very healing-one needs to talk about how one feels,but don't want to "burden" the family. You might also make her (or your boyfriend so he can pass it on) aware of the Y-Me support group for breast cancer patients and their families. They're on the Web.
By the way,there's also a group called Look Good,Feel Better. They are beauticians who specialize in beauty treatments for cancer patients.

The best kind of support you can give a person that is suffering from cancer is an unending friendship. That person will be on a major rollercoaster ride emotionally and physically. If anything, lend an ear, let them vent, cry, laugh or whatever. There are several support groups on Yahoo for breast cancer that is available for family, friends, caregivers and the patient.



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