Are some people uncomfortable dealing with others with cancer? I have a good friend of 20+ years that won't?

Question:

return my calls now that I have been diagnosed, although she has emailed & sent cards. Or is this not a true friend & it's more about their feelings??

Answers:
I have been a cancer patient for the last six years and I know what you are saying is abs. what I feel. There are lot of people who you thought would stand by you vanish without even a word and the strangest part is that some of those who will stand by you are those who you least expected to.
Its a strange world but human traits are all mixed up - some shameless and heartless, others who share your pain and have a place for you in their heart.

I'm a nurse. Sometimes people will sort of distance themsevles but please know this is NOT your fault. This person probably either has issues dealing with her own mortality or has lost someone close to her before to cancer and now fears another loss.
You can't really do anything but giver her time & space.
I'm not saying she's not a *real* friend, but you need to surround yourself w/ supporting, nuturing people right now. Give her time and in the mean time, focus your energy on getting better and being around those who are willing to meet your needs right now.
Best wishes!

There's a real good chance she doesn't know what to say to you in person. A lot of people are better at writing - hence the emails - than talking to people. Maybe she's afraid she'll say something that makes you feel bad. Maybe she wants to see less of you so she won't miss you so much if you pass? She may still be a good friend to you, but yes, it's probably more about her feelings than yours at this point.

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Are some people uncomfortable dealing with others with cancer? I have a good friend of 20+ years that won't?

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