ADVICE PLEASE...My Dad was just diagnosed with cancer of the larynx stage 4...he also had brain cancer?
Question:
Answers:
You and your dad are in a terrible situation, and my heart goes out to you. But you need to talk with his doctors to find out what the hope is. "Live longer" means different things. Two weeks longer with lots more pain? I sure wouldn't want that. Two years longer and mostly in comfort? That is certainly worth having.
But whatever you do, please support your father's wishes. Don't add to his burden by putting your own needs on top of his. Let him know that you love him, that you want him to feel as good as he can for as long as he can, and that whatever HE decides will be fine with you. He needs your support now more than ever. And if it is his time to pass, then this can be your last, best gift to him.
I wish you well, and I wish you strength. Good luck!!
Other Answers:
Ask him what he wants. If he wants to go through the treatments to spend more time with you then maybe it's worth it for him. Tell him how you feel and let him decide.
There is nothing you can do. He has to decide if he wants to get treatment to try to "buy more time" or he can just wait and it'll take him naturally. All you can do is support his decision, show him you love him, and accept that his time is coming. I lost my grandmother whom I was probably closer to than anyone (except my wife) 2 years ago and it was really hard, but you just enjoy the time you have with them and remember those times after it.
You guys must make peace with life and death, if you can't change it you will have to accept it and deal with it the best you can. Turn to family and friends, now is a good time to have support. I'll pray for you guys right now!
I can't say what I would do medically for him (it's a decision he will have to make), but I would support him and spend as much time with him that I could. I'm sorry for what you are dealing with and what you are going to be going through.
He's got stage 4 cancer. Let him throw in the towel when he's not getting any enjoyment out of life. Then just let him sit back in the hospital and enjoy our nations great pharmacuticals. And praise God that he can get them.
I'm sorry to hear about your dad.I will pray for him to get better..
Sorry to hear about that.
Ask him what he would like to do. He's the one dealing with it the most.
Don't force what you want on him, leave it all up to him.
In the meantime, spend as much time with him as possible.
that is horrible news. unfortunately, there isn't much that can be done to save your dad's life.
try to be with him every minute of his last months of life and make it as pleasant as possible for him. don't cry or be depressed around him. let him know you love him and keep his spirits high.
tell him that you believe in god (even if you don't) and tell him that you and he will be together again soon in the future.
well first off i'm really sorry and i know u really don't want him to leave but u have to let go of him he can't around forever if he dies look at it like this if he dies you won't have to see him suffer anymore and he won't be in anymore pain i hoped this helped all u can do if ba w/ him all u can bye
I am so sorry this is happening to you and to your dad. He can make these decisions with the input of the various medical specialists he sees. Let him know how feel. You can tell him that it is his decision to make.
There is quite a difference in quality and quantity...look within your heart and toward his wishes to find your path. I am sorry this is happening, but it sounds like you are a person who can make the best out of a dire situation.
ask him what he wants to do, enjoy the rest of the time you have with him, be nice don't argue with him ask him what you can do for him.you know treat him like a king. you said he was 61 one, that's along time to live, thankful for him.
This best thing to do is to pray about it and P.U.S.H (pray until something happens) If it is meant for your dad to survive then God will let it be. Just pray and be positive think forwardly, and its always nice to get another opinion from another doctor also. If you believe in God then He will work it out for the better, because everything that God does works for good only.
Honey i am so sorry for the way you feel! But the best advice i got when my 4 1/2 month old passed from S.I.D.S. was that "God will never give you something that you can not handle"
Think of it this way you have had many years to know and love your father!!! Only God knows what will happen and who really knows if it will come back?
there have been miracles since Jesus walked the Earth, and there wil be many more! Best Wishes!!!! Truly I wish you all the best!!
Depending on the success of radiation treatment, the tumor could possibly be downgraded from Stage 4. If it shrinks enough and depending on where it is, it may then be operable.
Of course, that is a lot of hope to put onto a chance. You need to discuss all possibilities with your father before making any major decisions.
You help him live one day or one minute at a time And you stand by him no matter what his decision is.
You don't have to encourage him to do anything, just love him and stand by him.
I bet you did not think he would survive the brain cancer either did you?, have faith and it will work the way it is meant too.
I'm really sorry to hear about your dad. You and your family need to sit down and talk about the options. It would be hard for anyone here to fully comprehend what the consequences would really be like for you and your family either way.
I lost my best friend to cancer. She found out when it was already stage 4 as well. She tried some chemo, but it just made the rest of her small amount of time on this earth painful and she was too out of it to interact in any meaningful way with any of her loved ones. My opinion on this (and it's just an opinion) is that if it were me or my loved one, I would rather have the time with them to love and be with them in the last days of life instead of clinging to a false hope of them living. I know how difficult that hope can be to give up. Can you ask your dad what he wants? If he is able, you should talk to him and your family and come to a decision together. God bless.
It's all in what he wants. But spend as much time as you can with him. Talk to him and ask him everything you can possibly think of. When my father developed cancer the 3rd time everything progressed so rapidly that by the time I could be there he was in a coma. There is nothing I would want more than to have spent more time with him before his coma. You have some time to "get used" to what's coming as much as a person can.
Listen to the doctors, if they say all they can do is make him comfortable, than make it the most comfortable time of his life.
Treatments (radiation, chemo) are really hard on a person. Perhaps he'd rather live the rest of his days feeling rather okay. Treatments will prolong his life, but the quality will not be so good. You have to prepare yourself for the worst outcome my dear. It's not easy, and you are never truly prepared, but you need to think about these things. Ask your father what he wants to do. How he wants to live. Cancer is truly horrible. Especially to those who love the afflicted, and can only stand by and watch. He needs you to be strong however. Say to him the things you need to say before it's too late. My grandmother died in 2004 from an inoperable brain tumour. It was really hard watching her go. I wish you all the strength in the world. And I pray for a positive outcome for your dad.
i'd encourage him to do treatment. there is still a chance that he can survive the brain cancer.
but if it gets to stage four. i'd just tell him to enjoy life and do the things that he always wanted to do. go travel and see the world. and perhaps you should go with him.
my father died from cancer but the treatments he receved did give him extra time .
when the doctor first saw what state the cancer was in he said to my mother how did he live this far then he had his treatments
and got two years when the doctor said he might get 6 months.
this was liver cancer.
enjoy the time left with him and what ever he chooses to do i wish you all the best.
my father was a very strong and fit he was a labourer all his life
and a non smoker pity he didnt drink he might still be alive.
I strongly suggest that you concentrate on the time you have left rather than the time you will miss when and if he passes away. If you do decide to go through with the treatments, you may make the time you have left less enjoyable due to that fact that he will be in a weakened state and in pain. spend the time wisely, go out and do things that you always wanted to with your father, build good memories, take pictures, have fun, act like every day is going to be the last and live life to the fullest while you can. I speak from experience, my best friends father had pancreatic cancer, inoperable, there was a slim chance that he would live for longer than 6 months but they put him on medication, he was in pain almost every day before he ended his life himself, which i didn't agree with, and my friend is devastated now because the time that was wasted on false hope, could have been spent having fun and doing the things that she had always wanted to with her father. please don't make the same mistake she did, you will regret it, if he only has a couple of months to live than make them the best damn months of his life.
*Hugs* I'm sorry. Stage 4 cancer is a euphanism for "Your death is going to happen very soon, please make whatever burial arrangements and religious arrangements that you feel you need to do"
I wish I had the best answer for you, not for the 10 points I might get but because I can, from experience, understand exactly where you are. It's a tough time you're in, and I know you want to know all there is you can do for your dad. Maybe I can offer two "pieces of advice" for you. Number 1: Remember that your dad is still alive, and if he is still functioning mentally, don't leave him out of the decision-making and don't put his decisions second place to yours or anybody elses. Show him that respect. That may be one of the last signs of love you can give him, and he desperately needs it now! And you will want to feel you gave him your best love as one of the last things you may ever be able to do for him on this earth. Second: Well, my second piece of advice got included in my first, and that is, show him you love him. If he was a good dad to you, and it sure sounds like you think so, let him know it. You won't have to gush and fuss all over him. He might not be up to it physically or mentally, but as his daughter, I'm sure you can choose a few good ways to show him unquestionable love, like sometimes just sitting with him, even when times get boring and quiet, and being with your friends might sound enticing. And, ultimately, when he asks you to leave the room, just for him to have some quiet time to himself, please do so without any fuss or tears. He may be going to "meet his Maker", sorry for the slang, and that's an awesome thing for one to do, and he may just need time for private prayer to ready himself for that, and sometimes just to get some physical rest, and to give him the peace and quiet to make some awesome medical decision. I know times are tough for you. I lost my dad last year, on March 1, 2005, after a long and mostly healthy life, and my mother and my sisters, one in particular, couldn't be mature enough to let him go without running up all kinds of medical bills to keep him "alive", when the doctors and nurses said that if they unplugged him from the machines, he would be dead. Prayer. God loves to hear from you all the time, and now most of all, because He knows you need what only He can give, a love and understanding that surpasses all else. Let God be there for you, and for your dad, and mom, if she's still alive. Trust me. God is the Only One who can give you all you need, so don't be shy. He's there for you already. God Bless you, and your dad, and your entire family. God Keep you all.
i am truley sorry to hear that only your father can decide if he wants to go throught the treatment to proglong his life in my opion this is his call i hope everything gose well i lost my grandmother to cancer . my opion ?
sorry to hear that, you should let him choose
ask your dad whathe wants if he understands what he has to go through in order to live a few more months or less.
More Questions and Answers
- The most effective homeopathic cure for skin warts?
- Low WBC for 2 Years Feeling Healthy, but..?
- Anyone here have Eustachian tube dysfunction?
- i am suffering from kelloids since birth what should i do to stop them as it is a genetic problem.?
- What is the safest/easiest way to get a good tan?
- What is a panic attacks?I think i have them..?
- Now they think I have a bleb?
- My Mum got an accident and got hurt in eye, now her vision looks any thing it is in double is any solution?