Need to know how to stop caring what my over-critical mother thinks of me? She judges all I do&is never happy?
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With my mother I came to realized that she was doing what she was doing because of her own issues and nothing I did good bad or otherwise would have an impact on her negativity. It was kinda liberating when I finally figured that one out.
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Just cut her out of your life. Mother or not, you shouldn't have to live with negativity like that. If she loves you, she'll be willing to reconcile and discuss the problem after you've spent some time away from her.
Do not let her bring you down my friend had the same problem and she killed herself and no i regret never tellin g her what im telling you!
I'm sorry about your Mom. She sounds very difficult and you're not going to be able to chanage her. But the good news is that you can feel better and learn how to more effectively deal with her if you see a social worker or a therapist. Good luck.
It's so funny I happened to see you're question tonight as I also had a similar experience with my Mother this evening! I don't think how she approaches me will ever change.so I guess how I react to her has to. That's so hard to do though. It seems like every time I resolve to not feel bad about myself.or to not get sucked into her criticism of me, it happens again. It seems that I want so badly for her to recognize how well I've turned out and what a great job I do as a mother, wife, career person, etc.I just want her to be proud of me. I think almost every kid feels that way.we all long for our parents acceptance at one time or another..and that's probably the lesson here for us. We need to really show it to our kids, so they don't grow up with our hang-ups. In the mean-time, I just keep trying to pass up the bait my Mother keeps throwing out to me.and just be happy with my own beautiful self.
VERY common condition this one.esp with mother and daughters. Give her time and gentlely remind her that you value youself, think highly of your own accomplishment and hope one day she will too.. BELEIVE ME..WITH Pactience she can come around. And also as time goes by you will become less sensitive to her critical nature. Mother's are worth it. Now my mother 87..has finally after all these years learned to respect me, because i continued to respect myself and reminded her. a frontal attack will never work so don't even try that. and good luck.
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been there done that
being a fellow piscean, i know how sensitive ur feelings are.that said---u need to focus on something else for awhile that makes u feel better about yourself. is there some hobby or something you could do? my mom was the same as urs---she did some horrible things to me but i just kept saying pls help me forgive her and i did just that. i was at her bedside when she died and the look of "i am so sorry what i did to you" in her eyes was incredible. just do the right thing for YOU. odds are she will never change and u probably just feed into her negativity. forgive her and dont be financially dependent on her in any way if you can help it. i agree with other person too: see a therapist.
the very best to you!! : )
never ignore her that is one bad step. if she feels your arent paying any attention to her she'll keep going. are you giving her attention? are you ackowledging the sacraficing she made for you? maybe she feels you owe her something. sit down and express your feeling with her maybe that will help.also she may be jelous of the way you treat your kids she may admire you and putting you down is how she expresses something that she has been wanting to say to you for a long time. good luck
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i go through the same things
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